![94](https://mercedesterrell.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/07/94-thegem-blog-default.png)
Penetrate the World w/Your Fierce C@ck & Compassionate Hear w/Men’s Coach: Lorin Krenn
Helping men and women experience deep intimacy by embodying masculine and feminine dynamics, our guest, Lorin Krenn, invites us to experience the most intimate life, connection, and sex possible!
As an Amazon charts bestselling author, teacher of deep intimacy, coach, and podcast host he helps men understand the nature of the female better, while helping women find the courage to be highly radiant and sensual, even in today’s world. His approach to intimate relationships and sex is provocative, radical, and life-altering, so please open your hearts and minds as you listen to this epic episode!
Topics we cover in this episode are:
•how to consciously relax
•how to f@ck with a woman with your consciousness
•healthy vs toxic feminine testing
•how to step toward your inner king
•t he evolution of a man from unconscious to awakened
•h ow to listen to the oracle of an awakened woman
• why men need mentors and brotherhood
• men’s blind spots
•h ow men can become a safe container for relationship
• how women can encourage their men to stay on course
• how men can use their woman’s menstrual cycle for their advantage in relationship
• why breath work is critical for all
• Spiritual Bypassing
Book recommendations:
• Understand Women Better by Lorin Krenn
MAJic Tricks:
•Discerning whether something is “new“ or a “no“
•Muscle Testing
See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.
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majic hour episode #94 transcription
00:01
okay greetings boys and babes and welcome to the magic hour a place where we navigate through life’s peaks and valleys with all the vulnerability and shamelessness we can muster with the help of world-class guests from all walks of life we uncover new truths and valuable tools for manifesting our highest potential i’m your host mercedes terrell along with my partner in shine jade bryce hey you guys last week while scrolling on instagram a post really stood out to me and just hit home for me so much it
00:36
was from a man that i’ve been following for a while whose work has always made me feel very understood i loved the subject of the post so much that i sent him a message asking him if he’d come on the show to discuss it with us he responded saying he had a full body yes i love those full body answers i am so lit up by this guy’s work especially because i feel it’s super in line with my own personal mission of awakening modern man so i am stoked to introduce me to this guy in his post jade and i
01:02
cannot wait to pick his brain today so let’s get him on our guest today helps men and women experience deep intimacy by embodying masculine and feminine dynamics inviting us to experience the most intimate life connection and sex possible he’s an amazon charts best-selling author teacher of deep intimacy coach and podcast host he helps men understand the nature of the female better while helping women find the courage to be highly radiant and sensual even in today’s world his approach to intimate relationships
01:36
and sex is provocative radical and life-altering so please open your hearts and minds and help me welcome laureen krenn to the magic hour do you know if i’m pronouncing that right lauren but i think he says it laureen right oh really i’m pretty sure um well we can ask him to say his name just correctly play the beginning of this show [Laughter] okay laureen like chlorine are you ready yeah hi hey guys can you hear and see me yes how are you doing i’m doing amazing what about you and i’m really grateful really grateful to be
02:39
here oh we’re glad you’re here too yeah we are too we’re super excited so it’s late over there for you huh it’s 7 p.m but it’s actually a good time i i like the evening okay okay sweet so we’re excited to pick your brain today on a whole bunch of stuff i’m going to read an intro before we dive in but um yeah do you have time you know a time limitation that we want to stick to or anything like that before we get started no okay we just let it flow and see how it goes um and feel free to
03:15
be like hey i’m tired we need to finish this at any time i promise all right okay ready mercedes yeah we’re already recording and let me just make sure my do not disturb is on before i start this okay yeah you sound good i’m glad you i guess because you already podcast so much easier when we interview a podcaster because of the wind noise and all of that yeah when people don’t have a podcast join yeah right okay so here we go our guest today helps men and women experience deep intimacy by embodying
03:59
masculine and feminine dynamics inviting us to experience the most intimate life connection connection and sex possible he’s an amazon charts best-selling author teacher of deep intimacy coach and podcast host he helps men understand the nature of the female better while helping women find the courage to be highly radiant and sensual even in today’s world his approach to intimate relationships and sex is provocative radical and life-altering so please open your hearts and minds and help me welcome lorraine
04:32
krenn to the magic hour what a beautiful intro i’m honored to be here i’m really honored we’re so thankful you’re here too yeah i was gonna steal jade’s first question um we have listened to a lot of your podcasts we’ve been following your work for a while now absolutely love your stuff but one thing i have not come across is your story of how you got to this work um so maybe you can give us the like highs and lows of how you came to doing this work around masculine and feminine energies
05:11
well it’s a beautiful question and it’s difficult to describe it because obviously every single experience i had in my life led me to where i am today but what had the most significant impact was when i just turned 15 years old my father died of colon cancer in my arms and next to that i suffered from an autoimmune disease called neurodermitis which meant i during the night i always scratched my skin open so i would always wake up with open wounds and when he died it became worse and this this pain this immense suffering
05:56
and basically i can really share what really happened is after he died i was going for so much suffering and what i did after high school i came home i opened sad music and i did breath work for hours at the age of 15 16 reading spiritual literature practicing yoga and pranayama and i would just do breath work for hours and just cry have this deep traumatic emotional releases like really and this is not is not exaggerating anything here but i would cry on the floor for an hour without being able to move and even though this sounds very intense it
06:35
was very intense but in hindsight i’m so grateful because it was during these moments of immense lows where i cried on the floor and didn’t know what to do with my life where my inner teacher started to awaken it’s almost like i like to use it in that i like to say it in this way suffering cracks our heart open so my suffering cracked me open and it’s very difficult to describe what happened then but suddenly i started to have this epiphanies in my meditation practice and i would wake up in the
07:10
middle of the night and journal things about the feminine and it made no sense to me at all but after some time i just surrendered and people out of the blue started asking for coaching even though i didn’t offer it after a couple of sessions a man’s life at beginning i only coached men was completely changed and i didn’t understand myself i didn’t know what i was doing but in every time i had a coaching session every time i wrote something it was like a higher consciousness took care of me and just
07:40
did that for me and i was just there like okay what the [ __ ] is going on with my life like literally changing so incredibly and i know this might sound abstract but there is no better way i can explain this as of now at least so it’s like about tapping into feeling sense and that just is something that opened some sort of intuitive like channel that allowed you to do work yeah wow i’m glad i asked yeah that’s a beautiful story and as you know i was so into your post about listening to the oracle of an awakened
08:18
woman as the fastest way to reach higher states of consciousness and you also have a podcast episode titled if she doesn’t challenge you leave her i believe is is the title yeah um we would love for you to share this perspective with our listeners and exactly what all of that means the best way i can put this is the oracle of a woman or of the feminine is the embodiment of the intelligence of the universe the intelligence of the universe is feminine therefore a feminine being can embody and connect to that much deeper in most
09:02
cases this is not dogmatic black and white only women and men are like this not at all we men have that access too but this oracle is what has been suppressed for so many years and what has been misunderstood we over glorify the success of men and most people have no idea their reason or that no most most people have no idea how powerful a woman’s intuition is and when a woman has reached a certain level of consciousness then what happens and this is what i mentioned before is she starts to embody the intelligence of
09:42
the universe and this is what makes no sense to the logical mind this makes no sense to the ego this it’s it transcends everything and this oracle is what initiated me into sacred manhood this oracle is what taught me my blind spots and that is why i i honor in my work the feminine so deeply because it was the feminine who initiated me into who i am today i love that you you also say that feminine testing is highly spiritual and messy necessary for a man’s evolution and that a man can never truly become the king he’s meant
10:23
to be if he hasn’t gone through intense fierce testing of the awakened feminine and i’m curious for the men listening if they’re like feeling excited about that or if they’re just like cringing in their seats um but i wanted to discuss the difference between healthy feminine testing and toxic testing um i think that’s super beneficial for women and men to know and also i wanted to point out that like we women question ourselves why we’re testing you so much but deep down when it is the healthy feminine testing
10:58
it is coming from love and it is like you said we’re just um wanting to call forth like that deeper awakened consciousness that deeper king within um but we i at least in my case i have guilt around that because i feel like i’m alway it’s almost like you feel like you’re trying to change your partner or you’re trying to um you’re putting too much pressure on or there’s always something you can’t just you know relax and let them be you know but it’s when you are deeply intuitive and you
11:29
are deep deeply connected to that um nature that you speak of it’s almost like you can’t just sit quiet when you know that there’s more to uh step into yeah and the reason why a woman or why the feminine tests so much is because at the deepest level the feminine cannot settle for anything but the freest and most enlightened version of a man so it’s almost like we could say on a on a mind level a woman might say okay i’m gonna stop testing now why do i constantly wanna test my man jesus [ __ ] christ this is too much you know
12:13
but at a deeper level and it’s exactly what you said the more awakened the woman becomes the more she expresses the intelligence of the universe and when the universe wants to [ __ ] test then it just tests and the feminine is the embodiment and it’s literally impossible you can’t just become a more conscious woman at the same time stop testing so much you will test more and and the funny thing is before i go into the difference between healthy and toxic testing is the testing always adapts to a man’s level of
12:49
consciousness and freedom which means the i like to i call it easy testing and complex testing so i’m going to give a practical example that otherwise it’s so much theory and abstract an easy example of an easy test would be you say that you’re going gonna get ginger for dinner i don’t know just just i just made that up and then you don’t get it and you realize she’s in a kind of pissed off irritated moods and this would be an easy test and you would simply say to her for instance something such as hey baby i’m feeling
13:24
you i i didn’t keep my words i know and um i wasn’t in integrity boom not not some pleasing i’m so sorry i’m so sorry baby i bow to you no but i wasn’t integrity i just didn’t get it i forgot about it that would be an easy test but a complex test would be for instance you have deep rooted abandonment issues and at a certain point in the relationship when it gets very secure she will start in the most mysterious ways in the most complex ways which make no sense no sense to you she will start to
14:03
pick on these blind spots and a lot of men and this is what you mentioned before a lot of men can’t deal with that they will be like what the [ __ ] is your problem why why am i constantly feeling this fear she’s basically throwing you back at your own shadow constantly and this is again not because she she doesn’t like you or she wants to change you this is because she deeply loves you she cares so much about you that she is willing to test you in the most complex most mysterious ways and it just requires so much
14:39
opening of the heart so much understanding okay i’m not my thoughts i’m not my habituations i’m not my shadow it just requires every time you pass a woman’s testing you have to transcend your current level of consciousness and and that’s why it’s so hard sometimes but at the same time it sharpens a man it forges him it’s the f her fire is the testing that forges him into a spiritual warrior and now the difference between toxic and healthy testing it seems like a thin line but it isn’t a
15:16
thin line it’s a big difference toxic testing would be something like ah i don’t feel good because you didn’t hold the space properly you know i’m feeling like [ __ ] because because you don’t make me feel safe this could be one example or just projecting something but healthy testing as you said is always coming from a state of love which means even if the man would fail the tests it wouldn’t end in a disaster in drama and in fighting it would it would still be rooted in love so the difference is always it comes from love
15:55
and it also there is an understanding that he how much he has to go through in order to pass that testing so it’s not a i’m gonna [ __ ] test you and you just have to awaken right now that’s projecting that’s really hard but there is always an empathetic deeply compassionate approach and to to finish to wrap up my answer i like the image i have the image of while she’s testing you she can be very fierce and you might look at her and be like okay whoa she’s so fierce what is going on but deep down her soul is whispering
16:31
rise warrior rise and you have to hear rise warrior rise and when you rise then what happens then is just magical because she opens so much further to you at the same time you get more initiated and more rooted in your masculine depth and consciousness i love that i think oh sorry i i pictured two like whether it’s coming from your inner child throwing a tantrum or you’re a wise woman that’s just asking for a level up you know maybe two when it comes to the toxin toxic and the healthy what were you gonna say mercedes i was just gonna
17:20
well the first thing that came up i have i i wanted to kind of go over some of those points again because i know this is such an esoteric conversation and it’s especially if some of our listeners you know our listeners are about 50 male 50 female so they’re gonna be both looking at this from the two different perspectives which is why it’s beautiful we’re all in here together um but if i’m listening through the ears of a man as much as i can being a woman but hearing that women are going to test me over and over
17:50
sounds exhausting it sounds exhausting and it sounds the opposite of freedom right an opposite of like unburdening and you almost worry like i would imagine as a man you’re like well i don’t want to give her that power right over me that’s an interesting yeah conversation too and where that comes from is a toxic cycle right a toxic storyline so i don’t do you want to touch on that before we address any of this yeah yeah it’s it’s definitely i can resonate and i’m gonna be as vulnerable as i can
18:21
and um i i had that thought and i still have it sometimes i’m like oh my [ __ ] god why does she need to test me all the time but at the same time when i level up when i get initiated i’m like all right this is it i want to be tested more so it has to be a healthy balance it’s not constantly being in the process and constantly being tested so when a male client comes to me and says i’m constantly being tested i’m like hmm maybe that’s not healthy testing you know what i mean there needs to be a
18:55
healthy balance of i’m testing you you are passing the tests you’re getting an issue in a higher state i’m opening more up and then you’re both enjoying and celebrating that moment without any tension constantly yeah so there’s an ebb and flow between the work and the relaxation i’m curious so the um around the toxic testing i know that an example would be like threatening the relationship probably oh yeah however i see how that can get a little great because there is the difference of like every
19:30
time he forgets the gender you’re like that’s it i’m done you know but but when you’ve been asking for something for you know eight nine months and you’re asking for a certain type of growth or a certain type of um shift to happen and you have to now say if this does not change this is no longer a safe and healing container for either of us so i think also there’s um that gets a little blurry there too i i totally agree and i mean there is a big difference between when you are in a little disagreement
20:05
and suddenly it’s like if you keep showing up like this we gotta break up or what you just mentioned which is this man is continuously not showing up and this is not threatening a relationship this is being honest this is being authentic and this is being real because if you realize this is not safe then this is your truth and it would be a huge disservice if you wouldn’t express that so i love what you just mentioned and i completely agree and do you feel that the woman is the the sorry mercedes i keep i’m stuck
20:36
do you feel like the woman this is the situation this is the um scenario whether the man is further along in his growth path whether he’s behind her in the growth path or whether they’re equal do you feel like it’s always this is the case or do you feel like sometimes it may be the opposite or how do you feel about that um it can definitely be the opposites but in most of the people i work with in what i see at least in my subjective bubble most of the time it’s the woman who grows and evolves in consciousness
21:14
and and it’s the man who is realizing oh [ __ ] wait a second uh i need to grow too but of course that can vary and again none of these teachings none of these things are dogmatic none of this is black and white or a woman has to be feminine a man has to be masculine this is not about this is so dangerous that people easily use these teachings and put people into a box right okay this is this i have so many feminine traits but still my core is deeply masculine but i have deeply feminine traits i mean and that
21:48
coexists that doesn’t mean i am 50 50 or something like that so i hope that that answers you yeah i think that sometimes women can feel frustrated and men feel frustrated if in this dynamic because it can feel like the women really desire a man that leads but i think if we can [Music] accept that sometimes that truly deep down because of our intuitive state we are so much the leader in the relationship when it comes to um growth and then if we can let go of that that like desire to be led to be led to be led then
22:32
we may feel i don’t know how to articulate this but we may feel like uh more ease in our um role and then we can [Music] he feels that ease and then he’s more accepting of the entire situation and then he’s able to kind of step more into that role that we’re asking him to i feel like i’m not articulating articulating that correctly no i i’m totally getting what you’re saying and it’s very deep i mean you always hear in this realm of masculine feminine dynamics the masculine is the energetic leader or at least i have used
23:07
as as the energetic leader because it depends i see it’s of course the difference between physical realm and angelic realm but still what you’re saying is very deep and this is also where these teachings are get a little bit blurry because the truth is yeah the masculine leads right but so often it’s the oracle of the feminine that initiates growth that sees what’s the next step so again these things are not black and white but what’s really important is that the masculine leads in certain scenarios well she might
23:44
lead to the growth in some in in a certain way for oracle for instance in the bedroom that’s a place where the masculine can lead a lot and it’s it’s quite tricky to put this into practical terms right now but let’s use the example of which restaurant you’re going so leading in these areas okay we’re gonna go there for vacation i’m gonna take care of that baby okay we’re gonna go to this restaurant i’m gonna call the uber you don’t have to do these things i’m the masquerade is the master of space
24:21
and time and structure so you provide structure you provide that leadership wherever you can but of course if she’s if her oracle and she’s so in tune with it they would be stupid to say i’m gonna lead because it would lead into disaster ultimately does does that answer it to some degree yeah yeah i think it does i think figuring out first of all making it non-binary making it um less divisive if we’re really talking about unity here which is unifying these two energies masculine and feminine and allowing them
24:58
to live together that’s kind of the core goal in this conversation if we’re trying to you know our human mind our very binary mind is trying to delineate between what role do i play in this scenario and what role does he play in this scenario and that gets us into that divisive place where it’s more like um you know an ebb and flow or it’s about energetic agility or as like london and justin london angel winters and justin patrick pierce talk about uh being able to play the alpha and omega when needed and
25:37
step into those different roles as it’s called for in relationship instead of getting so rigid you know i gotta play this role if you’re trying to fit a rigid role as a feminine being you’re not playing the feminine at all right because you haven’t relaxed and you’re rigid i mean just the word itself so you can’t stand that word except in the bedroom no i don’t like it there either oh i don’t like it anywhere i have this this um on a i don’t remember what medicine i was on but i
26:11
was at a plant medicine ceremony i had this visual of my two of my best friends they’re a married couple kyle kingsberry and natasha kingsbury he is such a medicine man such an amazing coach amazing podcast host you know leader of fit for service he is a healer for sure um [Music] and always doing medicine ceremonies and very much in the growth path she is at home breastfeeding taking care of the kids you know holding down the house but because she’s not showing up to those things you would think more of kyle as the medicine man
26:45
right but in the visual that i had it was like she was actually the medicine and even though he’s the one showing up to those things and the one pouring out none of that would be possible without her because she’s the one holding holding it all together truly like at home and he would not have that grounding and that um just that that feminine strength that leadership from her that kind of sometimes has to pull him down from the astral plane you know and so it none of it would work without her so i just i saw too how even when the
27:19
men seem like they are so much in the work and so much on the growth path that it’s still the woman who are like the power you know and it wasn’t like this way of like kyle’s useless it’s all natasha but it was just seeing the beauty of the power of the feminine no matter what literally said to my woman a week ago i said maybe i’m the one on stage maybe i am the one who which people see as a teacher or as a coach or as a leader but the truth is i couldn’t pour or share any of that without the medicine that she gives me
28:02
and and this is what i briefly went uh mentioned before we over glorify the success of men because it’s often men who are showing up as the leader and we don’t realize that the woman next to them at their sides is giving them this immense wisdom and strength and helping them and i can say with full embodied conviction in my body without my woman i wouldn’t be able to put these teachings into words because because it is through her where i get to embody these teachings so i love what you’re saying but at the same
28:50
time at the end of that visual i was like this is why women are so tired we do so much work yeah and this work is often is often not seen it’s like i mean maybe some people wouldn’t agree with me but if you are a man and you’re a little bit conscious you’re like a special [ __ ] snowflake in this society oh my god he meditates oh my god he’s doing this [ __ ] uh he’s breathing his sexual energy up and he’s not a slave to his sexual energy but i don’t hear i don’t hear something
29:26
like oh my god she is radiating such softness she’s literally cracking every man’s heart open when she enters a room i don’t hear stuff like that yeah and even if there is the like oh she’s breathing that sexual consciousness up there’s like a uh i don’t know like she’s cool it’s so it’s so like sexy when a man does it but when a woman does it it’s like that should be kept in the bedroom you know like type of thing i just laugh but it’s not funny actually yeah well it i
30:02
mean it is laughable because it’s so obvious especially i think to us sitting here now but you’re you’re 100 right i’m over here you know people listening this can’t see me nodding my head ferociously but i do think that we have this weird you know paradigm in our society right now that doesn’t uh i don’t i want to call it credit or praise females for being female which i think we are doing here we are doing the work of changing that narrative hopefully um but i was going to ask you on that point
30:35
and by the way like anyone listening please let that resonate all the way through you and and next time you see a woman really in her femininity or even a man who’s also diving into his feminine energy praise them for that energy because that is what this planet is lacking right now it’s what we’re trying to come to balance with yeah because i think if a man is not doing it just to say something real quick right there if a man’s not doing that if he’s not able to listen to his own intuition and drop
31:01
into his own heart there’s no way he can listen to his woman for sure because he’s not able to meet himself there so it is important that he’s uh i feel like some people who are some men who are very in their heads and not in their hearts um [Music] those are the ones who may struggle with hearing their woman yeah they can’t be often enough to hurt as well to open to to her but what are you going to say lorena i was going to ask you about the opposite of that just not to to i guess this is what women do we go in
31:35
and be empathetic and compassionate about but how are you handling this situation as a man which is funny that that comes up now but that’s important i mean this is the energy we need to be supporting in the world guys so this is experiential right now happening for me um i wanted to know as a man who is awakening and and is exploring this this this dynamic between um the energies and can praise a woman for being feminine like this instance we’re giving right now do you you you get praised from especially from women i’m assuming for
32:10
this ability and a skill um is it is there an adverse when it comes to certain groups of men who are still in that really you know called toxic masculinity even though we don’t love that term here you know what i’m saying um we’re wounded masculine yeah wounded masculine is there is there um backlash from that group for you yeah absolutely i mean i would say i’m very protected i’m very guided whatever my inner teacher or my guides are doing they’re really keeping me out of struggle and i’m deeply grateful for
32:44
that but um of course especially i say a lot of provocative stuff it’s just who i am i love to sleep i just it’s just who i am and some people don’t like that and for instance people who don’t like that is are these kind of red pill guys and because for them and that’s interesting they they often at the beginning when they don’t know me they call me like a softie or someone who is like ah this is just a feminist you know what i mean he’s just saying all women about to the goddess and so weak but interestingly when they
33:22
see me when they connect more with me they’re like wait a second and i even had men who told me i was in this whole red pill stuff but for you i realized wait a second there is a much deeper and more profound approach to this and i will say this again and again as much honoring i am of the feminine as much as i appreciate the feminine i am also fierce this doesn’t mean that i’m a pleaser then because that’s a big problem in today’s society is that also society but it’s one of the biggest struggles for men
33:59
is is that they’re either too much in their heart or too much in their [ __ ] and those who are too much in their hearts are often what we refer to feminized men and i had that experience my father dying early and being this feminized man and it really needs this balance between connecting to your primal raw energy because the truth is you cannot lead only from this heart heart heart sometimes what’s required is uh [ __ ] it i’m just gonna take i’m just gonna do this i got it i’m gonna take
34:36
care of that that kind of energy or let’s say you are walking down the street with your woman and and a guy touches her butt it’s a really intense example but you can say oh hello universe thank you for this teacher i love you so much and honestly shut the [ __ ] up yeah like i i will forget my i will abandon my spiritual virtues when that happens i already know that i will get really really in an energy of like okay i gotta hold myself now so not to say that i will beat him of course that would go would be the other
35:12
extreme but what’s required is a really fierce energy and worst case scenario pushing that guy against the wall and telling him back off right now this is a boundary right which creates this is a bone yeah that the boundary thing i’m sorry i didn’t mean to cut you off learning but i just want to iterate you know stay on that point for a second because this has been coming up in my life a lot recently um the boundary piece is where i think when we settle into this feminine energy that’s what creates
35:46
stepping into victimhood which is where we don’t want to end up right so we become um softer is what we’re talking about here if we’re in this feminine energy and what happens there is sometimes there is no boundary because it’s very fluid it’s flowing it’s soft and without boundary and victimhood starts so the boundary is the thing where as a as a female body embodied person how do i want to say that you know what i’m saying um i have to remember that i have to basically you know be agile enough to
36:22
also step into my masculine where i need to set up boundaries and hold boundaries for myself discern where the boundaries are necessary and reasonable and all those things uh and if we can do that like you’re talking about when you’re walking on the street you gotta set a boundary with this dude he can’t just be jumping on your chick you know what i mean like you have to be there to say something and for her in order for her to feel safe around you as well i mean that’s an important part of just
36:50
relationship with your woman not just with yourself um sorry to interrupt you here but what comes here is the warrior archetype and even though this might sound cringe to a lot of people i’m old school i love everything around the warrior archetype we did here even though the lover is quite strong as well but but here is the thing if like 10 guys are running at you then you get your woman safe and you die for her worst case scenario but it’s what every man has to know in his heart he has to be willing to die for his
37:24
woman and i know there is such an intensity in that and people might be like hey wait a second but this is exactly this kind of warrior archetype and this is also the places which we often label as not spiritual oh warriorship that’s not spiritual oh dying for a woman oh that’s that’s really strange of course it’s an exaggeration hopefully that doesn’t happen but still this this we need to go and touch these places as well in order to set proper boundaries and we’re still here on a on a human realm in a in a human body and
38:00
we can be as spiritual and as full of love as we can be but um yeah we’re still we still we can transcend our biology to some degree for sure and i know that but we’re still we’re still animals in that sense and honoring that celebrating that harnessing that accessing that connects us more grounds us also more with mother nature instead of being this high vibrant flying in the air kind of spiritual snowflake yeah absolutely i think that’s what this this work is all about and what you have been doing such an eloquent job of
38:43
relaying to the world so thank you for for your work for your efforts here um not to praise you further as a man doing this work but i still think that’s important um i mean it’s important to still give you praise where where it is really do uh i was going to move this on because this is a good time to to go into what it means um when a man stops growing but before we do that i do want to kind of backtrack on on all we’ve come through thus far just because again a lot of our listeners i know are new to this um i
39:17
wanted to touch on the fact that you just mentioned the warrior archetype and that this is related to union archetypes king warrior magician lover that’s a beautiful book there’s a book titled that actually if you want to look into that at all and get deeper into that work but um to take us back to where you were discussing how to uh how a man can see his woman as an oracle and to know when feminine testing is toxic or not i just wanted to kind of touch on a few points that to me were really um worth reiterating to some degree because again
40:01
i know this is this is this is a topic that’s not easy to grasp like jade and i have been studying this stuff for years and it’s still coming you know in in experiential is a lot of how you have to learn this stuff but discerning the difference between when i as a woman and projecting onto my partner or challenging him through my own truth and love to grow that is that’s a challenge for me and that’s important i think for women listening to understand is that the only way you get to be discerning
40:36
enough to know that you’re consciously choosing to challenge men even though i’m saying consciously but it really happens kind of just happenstance you know the opportunity comes up and as a female you jump on the opportunity you don’t really think about it it is part of our nature however you’ll know that those times when you do challenge your man are coming from a truthful and loving place when you have done your own work and that means you have dug through your own traumas and done the ugly you know work of unbearing
41:09
a lot of things looking at them becoming aware of them and then changing the storyline that you might have been living that had been toxic in you for a long time so i know that is again esoteric there’s so many places you can look into that work deeper but that’s that’s i don’t want to give permission to to women around the world to just start projecting onto their men because well that’s a test i heard on that on the podcast this is a this is me testing you are you gonna show up for it if you are doing your work actively and
41:40
you can say that you are meeting yourself in a lot of ways you’re loving yourself you’re you’re doing this work for yourself then when you go and meet your man in a situation where you decide to challenge him it is likely coming from from that positive place and also when you do the work it causes you to be introspective enough to know that when you send a challenge out there you go wait was that a was that a projection or was that a true challenge and if it’s a projection then you can say hey sorry i
42:14
you know if you have any guilt around it it’s probably a projection but guess what you get to go and apologize for it and then take it back like hey that wasn’t for you that was actually some [ __ ] i need to deal with but even then you saying that shows that you’re doing the work as you’re asking right you know like uh you’re so you are looking within you are doing the work and like um i know for me when i’m at when i’m asking for something from the masculine and it’s coming from a place of desire because i
42:47
want this in my king i want this in my you know relationship i often feel like well is this because i’m not cultivating this in myself is this something i should be am i seeking outside myself and so i think i love that you said that and i think it shows if you’re if you’re the point that you’re pointing it out or the fact that you’re pointing it out and like bringing it up shows that it is something that you do you know um but sometimes i can come from a guilty place too like absolutely and then you
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have to re-examine that so the that’s beautiful you bring that up because that’s the the second part of of what i wanted to add on to laureen’s point earlier is that as we are as women as we are testing our men or challenging our men we figure out that piece about are we projecting or is this a true and loving challenge and is this me trying to fill a god is this me asking a man to fill a god-sized hole and that’s that’s a big piece of this because when we asked i asked that question about like well as a man i would feel
44:00
like this is just testing and testing and testing it’s exhausting like whenever do i become free of this burden there’s that peace in a female that i feel like i am yearning forever and until i had a teacher tell me like you’re going to yearn and long for something forever because when you are in the feminine energy you are essentially the it’s longing the void you know you are this chaotic black hole you know so in a sense you always need you feel like you need something to fill you but that is the the
44:35
you know there’s a there’s a line where it’s another human being can come and meet you at a certain point and then the rest of that is is god or yourself you know that you need to meet yourself here and so are you asking your partner to fill a god size hole which is unreasonable so if the answer that is ever yes then you need to reconsider how much of this can you actually ask him to to meet you on and then how much of it do you need to meet yourself on or you know and you can use yourself or god or however you
45:07
want to use that term um but it’s something that only you can facilitate essentially your communion with the divine your communion with god your communion with yourself can only facilitate filling that other part of your yearning or longing and i mean i’m gonna say something provocative here but also in the kind of goddess movement there is so much spiritual bypassing both in men and women it’s not that one is more it’s the same so when it comes to spiritual bypassing it’s the same it’s 50 50 women and men
45:41
and it’s like i see that like i’m such a goddess i’m testing and all of that at the same time struggling with immense avoidance and also unconsciously subconsciously manipulating men and every man is not woke enough you know this kind of mindset where are all the [ __ ] conscious man well guess what if you do the work if you are ready he will show up or they will show up this is not necessarily prone to monogamous relationships even though i experienced that it’s not everyone’s reality and it’s not black and white but it’s really
46:18
this okay um if you were saying where are all the conscious man i’m i’m doing all the work but all the men i meet they’re just so emotionally unavailable then it means you’re missing something and this as harsh as it sounds but the universe is quite it’s quite simple it’s not but it’s basically it’s like okay if you’re ready you get it i mean i don’t know if you agree with with me on these guys but when i was ready for something it came it was never like oh i’m ready oh where
46:50
is it now weird it’s not there and so just and i’m talking about the awakened feminine i’m talking about the rise of the feminine but that doesn’t mean that there is not a lot of spiritual bypassing going on that also means by the way that some women will misinterpret my message to the world they will use it and i think this is what you were touching upon before they will use this in order to project everything on their man and there are many women who stay in a relationship all the time and say my man
47:24
is so bad he’s not showing up why the [ __ ] are you in this relationship then oh yeah but he needs no he doesn’t need to you should get out of this relationship if you’re constantly complaining complaining complaining complaining so yeah spiritual bypassing is one of the most i love talking about it because i’ve been such a bypasser and i know how it feels like so i’m not saying this from a from a disconnected all these [ __ ] bipartisans i’m saying this from empathetic approach as well
47:53
because i mean i was the guy meditate in the morning and then go on a date and be this idiotic fuckboy kind of what you call it it’s like wait wait a second meditate and do all the spiritual work and then treat women like sheets something is all fear oh yeah that spiritual bypassing piece is big i think it’s not it’s not even about you right it’s not about harping on this i don’t know i want to say this it’s not even about harping on are you doing it right or wrong because that’s then you’re back
48:26
in the conversation of grasping you know you’re grasping um it’s like do it wrong like just just do it wrong and you’ll see quickly you know the universe or you will be corrected and a lot you know you will quickly be aligned much more quickly than i think people even realize we get nudged back on to the alignment if we if we even just chant if we become vulnerable enough to take the chance and say i’m gonna go out there and attempt to be the goddess and i’m gonna do it wrong i’m gonna [ __ ] up and then i’m gonna get
49:02
you know nudged back like oh that didn’t that didn’t work right okay well let me figure out what i did wrong here and that’s gonna realign you so quickly so i guess i’m only saying that because spiritual bypassing is for sure it’s happening and all of us i i definitely do it do it still um me too we have to do it though in order to know where we’re doing it i mean that’s just part of the process right so not to shame anyone who’s in that situation now or has done that or finds themselves you
49:31
know meditating in the morning and then going on a date and treating someone [ __ ] whatever like just use your example but you had to do that in order to figure out that that wasn’t feeling right for you you had to do it so anyway take that that leap try it and then it’ll be corrected quickly and easily um i don’t know about easily but it’ll be quick correctly quickly i bet i and that piece about grasping i think that’s where you can really notice whether or not you are in alignment is when you feel because that’s for me like
50:00
for me i know i’m not in alignment when i’m just like pushing the boulder uphill and like grasping and i’m like no i’m gonna make it happen you know and i get way too rigid to use the word jade loves um instead of trusting in the process and letting go a little that’s for me my challenge you know might be the opposite for someone else where they need to be pushing a little more they need to be a little more rigid so i don’t know if that helps anybody listening hopefully but um that’s this whole thing does come down
50:30
like you’re talking about laureen uh it’s it’s it’s simple because it’s it’s physics and it’s energy and it just is like it just is but it’s also the most complex thing to grasp as well that if you level up your energy by doing your own work by getting into your feeling sense looking at your traumas and stuff and working through where you’ve been an [ __ ] maybe that’s my thing your energy is now vibrating at a frequency you know this is physics here vibrating at a frequency that allows
51:04
other things to attract to you in that same frequency so yes it just will attract that’s how you’ll know that you’re in the right place because the things are attracting and then if you feel yourself well i don’t feel in the right place like let me grasp for this and that that’s not it either like relax trust the process so there’s all these mechanisms that take i’m still learning them they take time to learn give you know be kind to yourself out there of course we’re warriors maybe too much sometimes
51:35
we have to sit back into the lover and just let it happen all right um i’m gonna move this on we’ve been on this for a little bit because it’s i mean we could talk about that just all day i’m sure i want to ask you though i’ve heard you talk about how when a man stops growing all is lost right that’s the title of one of your podcasts so let’s just let’s just start there i know you have so much you can say about this um so let’s see what comes up there if you don’t mind
52:04
the masculine in its deepest essence is about service and when a man is not in service it means he is not growing because being in service to his own heart to the universe and to the feminine requires action it requires doing something with your life taking steps and trying things out working on something and it’s it’s very crucial that a man is i it’s i use this metaphor of going into the battlefield it’s like let’s go into war but not the kind of let’s go into war and kill people hopefully not it’s not
52:53
what i’m preaching but on a energetic level the harder the heart warrior or the warrior of the heart or the awakened enlightened warrior he’s like okay i i’m here i want to get financially independent i want to make sure to provide for my woman and me doesn’t need to be but let’s say in this scenario what do i have to do what brings me closer to that and then going into battle going into war and literally giving everything that at the end of the day no matter what results you have achieved you’re like
53:31
[ __ ] wow that was really intense and of course i like what you said before you got to be gentle you got to be forgiving i’m i’ve pushed myself beyond all limits and i noticed okay i can’t continue like this because it’s too much but still for most men who are not connected to their deepest purpose for instance for me i gotta be more gentle i know my purpose i know what i have to do but i push push push push i get into this rigid states really one of the typical traps of the masculine this rigid kind of 10 stop
54:10
state but for most men it’s really important that they that they are on the battlefield and not chilling on the couch not you can masturbate no no problem but but you should do it when you have no no shoots i know but i would advise people to masturbate when they men when they have been on the battlefields then you can self-pleasure yourself do it in a conscious way and of course i can share more about it but it’s not the topic right now but you gotta be in service because your service is what creates your self-esteem and and
54:50
the thing is meet a man who is in service he’s always confident he of course has his [ __ ] to go through in his shadows to work on but every man who is in service has a certain level of confidence assertiveness direction leadership and presence it’s just it’s just like that and those who don’t have it are often the distracted man the the leaf that blows in the wind just like i was like oh i’m gonna read this book this book do this watch this youtube video now masturbate it’s like oh come on just
55:23
prioritize and get closer to your [ __ ] deepest dreams what’s calling you what’s creating anxiety in your body like anxiety like oh my [ __ ] god if i were there in this moment i would probably [ __ ] my pants that’s your dream that’s what you have to be in the battlefield and it requires everything going in the battlefield is not like rigid fight fight fight it’s also surrender but it’s all serving this higher cause so when a man is not doing that all is lost because there is no growth and a woman can never
56:00
feel safe and is able to open and surrender and and trust the leads of a man who is in that energetic state i was there but fierceness is needed when you’re in this state not a kind of softy approach hey sweetie boy please stop watching netflix and and just and just start doing something it’s like hey get your [ __ ] [ __ ] together yeah from a man that’s the most powerful like what the [ __ ] are you doing with your life are you kidding me you’re wasting your potential not in a shameful way but in a way of you’re
56:36
wasting your potential i can feel your heart i can feel your gifts but what the [ __ ] are you doing here use them it’s not a shameful way it’s an empowering way but a fierce way and this really can’t come this really hits home for me this is i i have a over developed masculine energy so i attract men with a uh underdeveloped masculine energy or develop feminine energy of course um so for me to figure out how to become you know more in my feminine and more agile with setting back when i need to and not being the rigid masculine energy
57:14
that wants to tell my husband for instance you know who who is in more his feminine who you know we both are working on these things but i can see where you need to get up and go and whatever and that doesn’t come from your partner very well so what do you recommend men do to kind of if they’re in this situation where i think a lot of men are where they are not necessarily they haven’t shed their uh unhealthy or wounded masculine or they haven’t stepped fully into the masculine or the awakened masculine
57:48
um what are the the modes what are the modalities that they can use to step deeper into this i like what you mentioned before when a woman says to a man you need to grow you because for instance in in in this kind of projecting way you got to grow you got to do something with your life most men won’t be able to take this we don’t want to hear that from our woman um depends of course on a situation depends on the situation sometimes it might be necessary but what the most the mo the most powerful way or the one that works for most people
58:38
is to reach out to a male and masculine mentor and that doesn’t always need to be the case you could have a feminine spiritual teacher and she could initiate you there as well and help you with that it’s not black and white but for instance i experience this all the time and this is no exaggeration a man comes to me he has already filed divorce he has a has a son and and is just total havoc in his relationship and after two sessions they’re thinking about marrying again they’re living together again having
59:20
amazing sex and it’s just everything has changed and and i i see this guy in the first session like at this absolute engine limit and after two sessions that’s not the case anymore but that’s not because i’m so special that’s not because i am so special and i have changed that man’s life no but it’s because i have given him a masculine reflection and literally i will use the exact words my male clients say so often to me i always knew that that there was more out there i always knew that i could live my mission
59:56
of what i was capable of but i needed to hear this from you i needed to see you i needed to see how you hold the space i needed to feel and see that you’re real that you’re living this and once men realize wait a second this person is living it or leaving it to a certain degree i’m not perfect or anything like that but and at least embodying it to some degree when i saw one of my male teachers and i was like okay his name is zad baraka i was like wow and i believe his his teachings were not the main thing
1:00:32
that helped me to up level the main thing was just seeing him how is he holding himself how is he coaching others how is he speaking to others and then i was like wait a second that’s possible for me as well and just that thought oh that’s possible for me oh someone is living that it’s like whoa and that’s for your nervous system let’s talk about i’m just this word comes up right now for your nervous system it’s like oh whoa that’s a reality that’s real and then you can practice yeah it’s
1:01:01
intangible if you’re tangible and you’re in the energy space you’ve felt it because you’re you’re witnessing it yeah do you think that that also is the case because sometimes the women are in the men’s blind spots or hmm i’m not sure what you mean exactly me neither could you elaborate on this like they um maybe will you help men develop like you help men notice their blind spots but do you think that maybe a woman can be a man’s blind spot well and so they can’t hear from her
1:01:42
they have to hear it from someone else no not necessarily if you have reached a certain level of consciousness you can hold yourself so strongly that you don’t have to be okay and man needs to tell me this i’m not taking anything from my woman i can take things from my woman without ending up being feeling like a pleaser or weak i can take it but still be in leadership i can take it still hold the space well not always i’ve collapsed many many times before i was able to harness that but when my woman tells me something for
1:02:12
instance i mean we were in brazil just recently spending christmas there and obviously we’re together all the time like in really all the time in each in each other space it was fantastic but um one time i don’t know exactly what it was anymore she was going for she she had a struggle but it was a real struggle not an internal struggle but it was something with with flying restrictions covet you know all of that and i literally i said to her hey babe i’m gonna help you let’s get this sorted out but i
1:02:54
ended up checking something for myself and that was really i mean okay you know i really said to her baby i’m gonna take care of this you know this kind of masculine decisiveness um let’s get this let’s the biggest i said this the biggest priority right now is that we sort this out and then everything afterwards and she was like yeah thank you so much let’s do this but then i was getting lost and distracted and did something else which is messing up that i messed up badly there and she’s was of course furious with me
1:03:27
but not in a way of your bastards but innocent in a loving way because she’s so so far so awakened but still of course she was furious with me because that’s what i deserved in that moment i needed that reflection but she literally said to me laureen warning danger danger you need to evolve beyond that that’s selfish that’s your ego and you can say nothing that will prove otherwise you cannot talk yourself i i love communication so i always try to talk myself out of things but i was just quiet i was like okay
1:04:03
and that hit deeply i was like and i really had to hold myself to not collapse to be like okay just chill just chill just chill that hit deeply and and it’s important to be able to take something like that because if you can’t take that and you gotta hear this from a man then the relationship won’t last so um again it’s it’s a thin line but if she if you come from this is the same thing with the testing if you come from a loving energy and say hey babe i’m feeling this and it’s really
1:04:38
difficult and i don’t feel so safe but i love you so much but if you come from a state of read this [ __ ] book right now or i leave you of course that’s not feeling safe but still most men um listen deeper to a masculine mentor yeah but the the work i’m doing and what i’m seeing in the future is that that changes because that’s still limited isn’t it it’s limited yeah i gotta hear this from a man baby wait a second i just gotta talk to a man no just listen to it right now so yes it’s beneficial
1:05:23
but it’s it shouldn’t it shouldn’t be necessary shouldn’t be necessary always at least so getting a mentor a coach um i think these are beautiful places for men to start getting joining a men’s group having a some sort of brotherhood you know that that helps you initiate you into the manhood that maybe our culture your culture whoever you are wherever you’re listening from does not allow doesn’t i shouldn’t say it doesn’t allow it allows it we just don’t have that process set
1:05:55
into place for us already so we have to create that type of initiation um women we have you know we have periods we start you know we have a kind of some initiation processes already built into us men don’t really have that do you have any recommendations of how to create your own initiation process or brotherhood you know you’re certain maybe it’s a very small tribe of mentors or books that really heal you or whatever it is do you have a process of doing that especially right now while they are everywhere
1:06:29
it’s it may feel a bit overwhelming on her mentors yeah yeah coaches and joining a man’s group is really powerful but still the first thing i’d say is forget having a lot of friends at your side at least that’s my approach i rather have one or two brothers at my side which i know they will go to war with me even if i [ __ ] up and mess up entirely they would still pick my sides find these kind of people because just the ability to have a friends with whom you can speak about everything share your heart
1:07:14
hug cry that’s so beautiful and most men don’t experience that so yeah getting a mentor is one thing getting a mentor is more for your spiritual evolution and growth a lot of men then see the mentor as like a friend and brother as well and it can get blurry i of course have strong boundaries and i’m in my integrity i make sure that something like that doesn’t happen that a man sees me as okay let’s become best friends now but it can easily happen if you are not an experienced coach if you are not an
1:07:51
experienced mentor or if you don’t have certain skills right it can easily get blurry hey brother how was the sex last night you know what i mean let’s just back down and be in integrity so it’s the mixed mixture between getting a mentor if you really want to up level finding your blind spots but also finding this one just one person or two or three with with whom you can really speak and just go really deep that’s so healing to a man and of course if you want to join a brotherhood that really resembles also your virtues
1:08:29
be mindful of that don’t because i mean if you find a brotherhood which has a similar path that’s yours that’s beautiful but if if you go into something like red pill and it’s like oh women are only gold diggers they only want your money that’s also dangerous so there is not one answer to this but the most important thing i’d say is find this one or two people which stay with you and which will go into war with you no matter what and out of that energy you will be able to make proper decisions do i want a mentor okay do i
1:09:06
want more brotherhood and all of that yeah that’s really beautiful i think men listening to this will take so much away from it i hope they do oh um all right jayla i think we can let’s move on to our well i was curious how uh i was before we move off of two things i wanted to touch base first i wanted you to talk about conscious masturbation i think you called it what exactly that is because i’ve never heard that term um and then uh not that it i mean not that i call masturbation unconscious or anything but
1:09:41
i’m i wanted you to go deeper there and then i was also curious um how men can help discover their blind spots those are my two sub questions so this is a this is really really this goes in in a lot of depth i mean i could talk hours about this but i will try to make this as concise and as powerful as possible most the sacred i would call myself someone in the in the field of sacred sexuality let’s say that because my book is in the charts of sacred so people accept the word sacred sexuality so let’s say i’m in the field of sacred
1:10:24
sexuality and a lot of people who could you excuse me for a second i just lost track could you you said about the blind conscious masturbation exactly a lot of people in the sacred sexuality let’s let’s say fields there is so much information like the multi-orgasmic man dowie’s tantra no fap and go celibates do this masturbate once per week and i’m gonna say something provocative again here most of these people don’t have a transmission of the full depth am i saying i know it perfectly no but you have to have
1:11:11
more understanding than just being able to have energetic orgasms i mean i’m sorry right here to just this a lot of people in this field but if you think you’re a master of tantra or sexuality just because you’re able to move energy up your spine you’re a fool because it goes so much deeper everyone can master energetic orgasms at some point if they practice but it goes way way way way deeper so i’d say no fap isn’t the answer taoist tantra isn’t the answer none of them it’s a balance and
1:11:47
it’s also different for each individual so for some people might be really almost never ejaculating holding their semen and masturbating still and making love but not ejaculating using that energy breathing it upwards and doing this almost all of the time not and just a cup just very rarely ejaculating that might be for some people for other people it might be and yes i’m going to say this there is this often in the field there is this idea never ejaculate if you’re ejected as a man you’re weak and you’re
1:12:25
depleting yourself which is not true which is not true again it’s about context it’s about your depth and it’s about how much you understand your own sexual energy how deep you have actually mastered your own energetic orgasms and how deep you’ve been initiated into sacred sexuality so there’s so many approaches but i would say every man should masturbate because if you don’t masturbate and then you might get attached to your woman to having sex all the time and you don’t see her for a week and you can’t
1:13:06
take care of your own sexual pleasure and you’re like oh baby baby i need to [ __ ] i need to [ __ ] it’s like it doesn’t feel really safe you know it’s like you come grounded relaxed and then it comes but you’re not coming in with that energy a lot of i experienced this for me in the past and clients in the past also it’s this kind of energy okay i’m seeing my woman tonight we gotta make love we gotta make love but that puts so much tension and stress you gotta let go completely off that you
1:13:37
don’t even have you shouldn’t even think about it because the less you think about it the more you take care of your own sexual pleasure take responsibility and not make it dependent upon her the more it will happen the more she will invite you sexually um and of course i could talk endlessly about how conscious masturbation works how it works to breathe that energy upwards but what i will say to it is don’t the way you masturbate or the way you make love reveals your level of consciousness so if you masturbate totally crammed
1:14:15
rigid it just shows that you are probably avoiding something right you’re not doing this in a conscious way and so i would say really learn to masturbate how how would a king masturbate right how would how would a king masturbate he wouldn’t just he wouldn’t just be rigid and cramped and have a weird expression in his face he would do it with maybe burning some sage opening some gentle music and really making this a sacred ritual yeah i hear so much in there i want to use the word intimacy because it’s about being intimate with yourself
1:14:56
and i think so many men especially are afraid of intimacy with themselves and therefore how are they going to ever be intimate with their woman which is probably what she wants more than anything else right yeah and you hear pleasure practice you automatically think it’s a feminine thing you never you never think of a man having a pleasure practice you know so i do love that yeah i think that’s really important thank you yes yeah of course and the and the other thing was uh blind spots there is one the most powerful way i know of i
1:15:33
don’t think it will change but who knows the whole universe is change and it’s all about the body so if i talk to a man and i realize he’s going up his mind i’m like wait a second you’re not in your body right now what’s going on blind spot identified boom it’s like this not the exact blind spot obviously and the root of it but it’s all about being in your body so um i don’t know how it exactly works but i can just feel when a man in front of me is not in his body of course i feed it also when i’m not in
1:16:10
my body and there are times when i go out of my body but the moment you go out of your body that’s a blind spot i would put it as simple as that and that’s practical i’m not in my body wait what’s going on am i avoiding something am i numbing something so whenever you’re in your body it will be very difficult to um come across a blind spot of yours yeah our couple’s therapist asks us to slow down a lot and kind of feel you know it’s about feeling and again that’s the intimacy with self is
1:16:43
black when you’re not being intimate with yourself you’re not feeling what’s happening inside of you and he often asks us to you know close your eyes slow down and notice what you’re feeling and then just just the easiest way if you find yourself in a in a blind spot or in a place of um you’re outside of your body to slow down stop feel the actual feelings like my i feel warmth in my stomach it’s churning it’s you know my heart feels heavy i don’t know whatever you’re feeling dude my
1:17:15
shoulders feel heavy and tap in it boom you’re back in your body immediately and then go from that place you know yeah well what comes up to me i i hope it’s all right if i become so specific also in this world um for instance what a lot of men experience is when they’re in bed with an awakened woman it’s that they start to feel an immense intensity of emotion because she’s radiating that softness that vulnerability she’s so secure and sensual in her body so intimate i like what you said so
1:17:54
intimate with herself and so at home in her own intimacy and and you’re like wait a [ __ ] second you know and all these emotions start to wash over you and this is a pivotal moment when they’re when the emotions wash over you you’re not weak it’s totally normal but here’s the thing what happens to most men when they get into bed with an awakened woman they tur they start to lose their masculine energetic core why because the softness washes over them and now they’re feeling soft obviously and they stay there
1:18:39
but she first softens you and then she wants you to [ __ ] penetrate her properly and to bring that [ __ ] energy conscious compassionate but fierce [ __ ] warrior kind of king energy into the bedroom and this is always the same process well not always but mostly it’s soft it’s radiant it’s exploring one another and at some point it’s like you get into the zone and then you can harness that energy and that that’s very difficult and and that’s what you said also before i love that before anyone should practice some
1:19:23
energetic orgasm practice they should practice feeling feeling feeling feeling because the more you can feel the better lover you are the more you can feel the more you can hold space the more you can feel and and allow and witness in your body the more safe a woman will feel because you’re holding this strong energetic space no matter what she is throwing at you no matter how powerful how much she ex and she wants to express herself how many women play small in the bedroom don’t express their fiercest parts
1:20:03
because they know the man will shut down and be like oh baby it’s not my script that’s it’s not oh my god oh my god i’m so tense then my [ __ ] is like this now of course i’m joking here this is not meant in a shaming way that’s true yeah like yeah baby give me your fierceness give me everything scream moan give me [ __ ] everything let me hold everything i love it love it make it make it as intense as possible and when you are in this mindset mindset is [ __ ] in this embodiment in this
1:20:41
energy then it’s like it’s heaven because the most powerful woman who sets fierce boundaries no one can get close to her no one can see her most naked most deepest vulnerable parts but there you are and she’s trusting your lead she’s surrendering and that gives you a strength and confidence and power it’s just magical it’s like oh [ __ ] i love it yeah as you can see i’m passionate about this topic no it’s very juicy stuff like this is this is it it’s just getting to that as
1:21:23
we have a long roast sometimes ahead of us you know um love it though thank you for for elaborating too because it’s important to feel your uh your experience come through your energy when you talk about this stuff and that’s something so beautiful especially about listening to your show is that you can feel energetically you are you know in this work and relaying it through your voice and i think to me that’s like obviously here we are we have a podcast trying to do the same thing so we get it we love it it’s absolutely
1:21:56
amazing you’re in your calling bro not like not that you needed that yeah yeah you are um thank you so much yeah we we’ve talked a lot about how a strong woman reflects a man’s spiritual life back to him but you’ve said that we respond to their energy just like here in this example right but that we aren’t fully in our power we women aren’t fully in our power if they aren’t a safe spiritual container is like a perfect example of what you’re just speaking of in the bedroom and sometimes
1:22:29
this feels like a smooth dance and sometimes it’s a very frustrating process but how for the men who are desiring this how can they be more of a safe spiritual container beautiful question in the bedroom and in the relationship in general there are many many things i could say but the the most important one is embodiment and [Music] one of the um things that’s currently happening is that a lot of men understand intellectually masculine feminine dynamics that’s so true intellectual understanding when she tests me
1:23:18
you know i’m the masculine structure time space blah blah and i was there too and understanding something intellectual is the first step it’s nice it’s cool you can have a good conversation but when it comes to action when it comes to the actual moment what’s required is more than intellectual understanding what’s required is embodiment of the intellectual understanding now am i saying you have to be fully embodied achiever totally enlightened not have a single worry negative thought anymore and you’re
1:23:54
totally free yes exactly no of course not no i mean beautiful if you are i’m not that’s my that’s also my goal obviously i want to get there but it’s a journey as we know and that’s beautiful and but yeah integrity it’s it’s it’s in it’s embodiments and integrity i love thank you for helping me out here helping me out here um embodiments actually i love that yeah i didn’t think about integrity right now i love that thank you embodiment always comes with integrity it’s authentic it’s real you can feel it
1:24:38
and that’s the thing um about the reflection that a woman is always a reflection of your state of consciousness so when i was just understanding these things intellectually my girlfriend at that time or intimate partners um were showing me that i was full of [ __ ] obviously it was like i was like yeah i’m holding a space presence shoulders back strong warrior breath deep but [ __ ] my pants at the same time and they were like a to-do list instead of in the heart exactly but it wasn’t coming from the depth you know it wasn’t
1:25:14
it wasn’t an embodiment and again i talk very intensely but it’s a journey and i have empathy for it you gotta [ __ ] up you gotta try at the beginning with a script right or it’s most likely gonna be like a script you have to practice practice practice practice practice and awaken woman will understand she will feel that you are maybe not embodying it but she will feel that you are practicing and the fact that you’re practicing and showing up as powerful as you can will make her feel safe no perfection needed no
1:25:48
perfect shiva like warrior needed and yeah that’s basically it and what about on the woman’s side how can a woman encourage this in men especially if she has grown tired of not having it and she’s maybe a bit uh you know to the point where she doesn’t you know i don’t know how to articulate that but no i get it yeah two things first thing is show him through your innocent and vulnerable feminine the impact it has on your heart that he’s not showing up fully like show him don’t tell him you’re not
1:26:36
showing up fully but show him for your body maybe even for tears it’s not about faking tears obviously but still it’s this showing revealing look look i [ __ ] love you but if you don’t show up my heart contracts i want it to work but also if this happens again and again and again and again it’s wiser to let him go and this is harsh this is brutal no one wants to experience this but in hindsight he will be grateful because here leaving him is will give him a lesson not in a sense if i punish you and leave
1:27:19
you right now but in the sense of all rights this relationship didn’t work out now what do i gotta change and that is mostly where men go on this path i believe that most of the men who really dig my work have been have been for heartbreak have experienced that to some degree where they got shattered like oh [ __ ] i really messed up and now it’s also important to not go into the victim mindset then oh my god i messed up by a woman of my dreams and now i’m full of [ __ ] that i’m so worthless i’m just
1:27:53
gonna die no you gotta own it yes pity yourself to some degree yes forgive yourself and be gentle but you gotta own it okay i [ __ ] up and if you really want to save a relationship that’s the only way it’s really coming from a place of baby i [ __ ] up i know i know i [ __ ] up this is what i did this is what i did this is what i did there’s no excuse i’m not here to talk myself out of that because i couldn’t you can feel my energy anyway yeah and i think um i have heard a lot that it is the feeling of losing a strong woman or
1:28:38
the losing of a strong woman that awakens a man uh for a lot of men but i think that for the women there they deep down they know that and they’re like uh i’ve done all this work and now some other woman is gonna benefit but it sometimes it is exactly what the man needs not not saying that that is the only option but sometimes it is that is the thing that can really cause that breakthrough yeah definitely and that’s i feel like that i have that same story that runs through my head jade i don’t know if i’ll call it a story here
1:29:11
but the same thought anyway of it’s scarcity really right because we’re worried now we’re gonna detach you know let go of this person who you feel like you’ve invested time energy and all this into but that’s really and in a way instead of saying myself there it’s not fair i’ve paved the way for another woman instead you can say i’m so thankful that i was able to make it yes it was a service you provided here yeah i absolutely love being a good luck [Laughter] i love the sarcasm you’re welcome sir go on and have a nice
1:29:51
life now but i mean it’s a harsh ego lesson that is a harsh ego lesson definitely it’s like whoa but also the thing is it’s important for for women to understand is he a project or is he something that’s really real about doing the work because someone who is real might be still have some construction to do or whatever it’s a stupid metaphor but still but if it’s a project like yeah he shuts me down for three years every single day you know yeah that doesn’t sound like uh it sounds like a project
1:30:33
and a lot of women or there’s this subconscious story that’s running like projects because that means they’re not gonna face their own shadows yes yes because the projects it’s so true oh baby you never do this baby i’ll show you this baby you’re so strong so in this helping syndrome yeah god i gotta change him but an awakened man would be like wait a second what the [ __ ] is this coming from you here baby i love you but i gotta do my stuff right now i don’t have time to hold your hand all
1:31:08
the time i gotta live my mission i come back i love you as much as as i love the universe but still i’m not here to be a parent for you in this and that is that is also part of the awaken masculine being able to say something like this like hey baby wait a second then i love you but um my mission is my most important thing i gotta live my mission i gotta be in service and i love you so much but if i cannot leave my mission properly i have to let you go and that’s very intense by the way but um that’s strong but it’s yeah it’s needed
1:31:51
very strong and it’s authentic it’s not coming from a place of oh you [ __ ] i can’t leave my mission no right it’s like i love you i truly love you but in order for this to work in the long run i need to be able to be in deepest service this is my path and my boundary there i just correlated as you guys were talking about this the word project and projection oh my gosh that’s interesting so yeah like when we’re projecting we’re creating a project essentially and that’s that’s interesting to me that
1:32:30
blows my mind yeah it blew my mind i was like let’s see the word how they came up with that now uh um so but with this idea of projecting and or or the this relationship becoming a project in this instance for the woman creating a project out of her man um to me that’s you know the same same ideas i have to train him you know like oh you hear this kind of storyline in sitcoms on tv or something like that like oh you haven’t trained your your husband yet you know what’s wrong with you is everything
1:33:05
to me it’s like i come from the toxic pattern of that makes me want to vomit because i’m like you should already know like i don’t want to train anyone because that makes me feel like i’m got to take on this responsibility and burden of being the mother here and i definitely don’t want to have that feeling um so i don’t know if i have a question here i just wanted to like say that out loud that the the training of your man to me i maybe it’s like a whole nother end of the spectrum of that idea of of creating a project
1:33:41
where it’s like i don’t i so badly don’t want to do it but then i feel like if he’s not showing up he’s not showing up my only option it feels like which obviously you’ve just delineated another option which is to leave um or there’s probably other ones in there but my option it feels like is to create a project and be like okay well let me show you or let me show you where you need to fix something that type of thing and then i’m we’re talking about archetypes i’m in
1:34:09
the my magician and it’s not very loving at all it’s not very feminine either but but there is something i want to add to this i love what you just said um about the whole mother kind of thing um i do have a lot of empathy for men and also for myself now because most men don’t have brothers with whom they can share the depth of their heart so obviously what happens is when they find their queen or a queen or a goddess or whatever and they are going to they’re going to develop some kind of dependency
1:34:52
upon her but not now talking in a form of extreme attachment or something like that but she’s the one she is the best friend as well she’s the only one who listens to the depth of his heart while his brothers maybe make fun of him or don’t understand it and this can lead to a lot of tension this is definitely one of the biggest big problems that in society is that it’s unbelievable i think there was a study i don’t take me by my don’t take me literally but there was a study the amount of men who
1:35:26
commit suicide after a divorce is so staggering high compared to women because there are no proper support systems and which are coming now but still energetically there needs to be a lot of change so it’s like this was my woman or wait did i just say divorce well uh no sorry what i divorced maybe as well but what i was referring to was death when a car accident or whatever or something like that is like wait a second this person who knows my deepest most vulnerable parts loves loved me for who i am in my deepest essence is gone now and i have
1:36:07
no one no and even if you have someone who maybe a little bit understands not to the depth of how she understood me so this is a shadow of society and i can feel my heart very open a lot of sadness and i feel very emotional as i’m sharing this is because so many men are in this position and they are going for hell and they’re often labeled as attached codependent but it’s not necessarily codependency always it might be but it can also be okay but i have no one else who listens to me who holds the space to
1:36:45
me and that’s why i i care so much that’s why i want to call more often that’s why it’s so important to me and um yeah this is just like many things this needs a lot of work on yeah community yeah oh yeah that is a it’s frightening and so sad but here we are we’re going to make some strides towards changing that and i’m so proud to be a part of it really um and glad it’s coming okay little shift here but not too big of one of course um we’re gonna stay in this realm a bit so learning to consciously relax is also a
1:37:31
form of growing you say what you point out is different than sitting passively on your couch afraid to penetrate the world with your fierce [ __ ] and compassionate heart it’s a great visual i think you gave us a little bit earlier but explain to us what that really looks like this consciously relaxing for men this is very i think we touched on this a little bit but let’s go into that more yeah it’s a very very very beautiful question and deep um let’s let’s just use the that’s what comes from me right now let’s use the
1:38:08
metaphor shiva i love i i i don’t necessarily i i just want to be careful here i’m not a i’m not a practitioner of hinduism or come from that but i love i love what shiva stands for i’m talking about energetic wise right now shiver the destroyer of all illusions and if you look at pictures of shiva it’s a mixture between a warrior and also a very soft loving meditative poet at least that’s how i see it so you really see he’s like he’s trained he’s muscular but he’s not rigid he’s
1:38:44
not stuck it’s like he’s both he he embodies both the lava and the warrior and of course the king and magician as well but let’s use it in the warrior lava kind of scenario right now and that’s fascinating to me and i’m not always there but when i i’m difficult to put this into words but when i’m at my best i it’s it’s a certain energy you can tap into in this collective which is this kind of shiva nature or shiver energy that’s at least it’s on my own label obviously i like to put a
1:39:23
label to everything and just make it my own no i mean yeah that’s true and not make it my own and steal it but always making my own nail because i don’t want to copycat or say the same thing was i just want to make this my own and just i don’t want to lose your train of thought there but this podcast our our ethos is about creating your own personal philosophy in life by using work from people like you so make it individual individual yeah thank you and it’s like this this shiva nature and one
1:39:54
time i was really like contemplating about it and i was like okay wait a second this shiva nature is like water it’s like it’s a and i know we often say water is very feminine but still hear me out here it’s you are water when you can be water and you are fire when fire is needed so you are not just water and it becomes too soft and too flowing and you’re not just fire and burning yourself rigidly fighting and it’s really this kind of shiva energy or consciousness is this i also like to call it relaxed consciousness i think
1:40:39
eckhart tolle says relax i think it’s from him because i wanna yeah not dismiss anyone obviously um relaxed consciousness and that’s enormously an enormous turn on for the feminine because if if i i’m sure you can relate but if a man is like like this like you can you can feel like he has a stick in his in his ass you know what i mean it’s like it’s like oh okay you know but he’s if he’s like this and just sitting like this hey baby you know i love you so much i really appreciate you in this kind of
1:41:14
hinge position and really or not even properly looking at you being like in this kind of position so it’s about really this relaxed consciousness is relaxed when relax when you can relax but the funny thing is the more you relax the more you’re able to harness your fire when necessary and that’s a pivot that’s a key thing yes the more you relax into your body the more you are sharp fierce powerful presence in the moment where it’s required but if you’re constantly in your fire then you’re burned out yeah and when
1:41:56
it’s required you collapse you break down it’s what so many men experience in their work hustle and hustle hard fire fire they come to the woman total collapse and breakdown they can’t deal with anything relax consciousness and when it’s necessary you bring in the fire yeah i the way we’ve heard it here before uh in this type of energetic work is energetic agility and just knowing when to step into this part you know this energy and step into this energy when it’s needed um so that you don’t
1:42:31
or i love the archetype thing like i had an experience the other day where i i i had some guides tell me that i need to scream in order to get enter anger out of my body like i physically need to go out to the forest and scream is what they said well i don’t have a forest around here i’m in la so i went and drove on the freeway to la in traffic which you could be there for hours so that’s a good place to scream so i was screaming and what came out of me was my warrior archetype which i could hear was her very clearly
1:43:05
and because i’ve studied the archetypes enough i can see and psychology generally i think i can see you know this sounds like multiple personality disorder which maybe to a degree you know we all have some of that going on but basically i could see when that side of me my warrior archetype turned on and that was the first time experientially that i could see that archetype that lives in my psyche take the forefront and say like this is what i needed to express and she had a whole script she wanted to say and i don’t know to your point
1:43:38
to find a place where we can allow those different archetypes to take the throne so to speak you know to to to head the our realm um for a while so that this whatever needs to be accomplished can get accomplished but once the for for this instance once the warrior is done doing her job swinging her sword or his job he can step back and go okay sovereign you know king or queen in my case who who’s up next you know because that’s the person really at command or you know the person who’s really dictating uh the psyche the archetype
1:44:14
that’s really dictating what needs to be done and who’s the best in our psyche to take on that task um so that it isn’t the warrior always burning burning burning you know like just always at war at war at war because he will burn out she will burn out she needs to be able to relax consciously like you’re saying yeah that’s the way i perceive that i really dig this i guess i love the archetypes and yeah i love this i love it it’s nice to visualize on top of the fire the idea of shiva i love that as
1:44:50
well i think it’s so um important for i don’t know for everybody but for me it’s so important to have a visual a visual mantra you know the words are intellectual but when we add visual to it and we can picture something in our mind whether it’s shiva or this warrior or the kingdom that you know has these different the magician and the lover and everyone who takes the throne when needed um that adds the it taps into the feeling piece that then allows for embodiment you know it’s like one little step
1:45:20
toward and i think i’m sorry well i think that like our task too that is so hard for us as women is like staying open so that he can relax because it’s like the more and more that he doesn’t um i don’t know relax consciously or how you talk about uh [ __ ] a woman with your consciousness and like uh you know remaining conscious of her heart and the energy that her body transmits the more that that’s not done the more we close up yeah and then when we close up then it’s like we really just have two people
1:45:59
closed you know and and not not uh being able to experience all that we’ve talked about in this episode and i think that women it’s like that can be the hardest part for us is like staying open so i think that’s our task is that you know i think our script allows for all of that i know jade and i we’ve had so much time working on this together on this podcast and otherwise women i’m not going to generalize for all women but i know a lot of women especially in my sphere i’d say even in our sphere jade
1:46:29
we have this script of of needing to protect ourselves yeah and so we close it’s not even of heartache it’s more just like being let down yeah yeah exactly and it you know we’ve we’ve really done a good job i think in this show uh especially you learn of just giving people an understanding of why that’s come about in our society now why that’s what our culture looks like currently but that there is a way to step towards something better towards something else and change this whole narrative um
1:47:00
yeah and jade i think it’s just it’s we do close i don’t want to say too quickly because we we chose to do that at some point in our life because it was a protective measure right now when we can get to a conscious place and understand that we are going to be okay here if we stay open and that’s the work we have to do as women is figure out how we can be how can we um assure ourselves that we will be okay if we stay open because that’s what we’ve become afraid of is if we stay open we’re going to get hurt and we have
1:47:33
to so that we have to close and also not playing small is our other task i feel i know that um most men well we’ve all called calling each other in for a reason but if if this dynamic is happening the way that you say that it does the woman awakening the man then that man has called that woman in to awaken him but if she is not open and if she is playing small then how will she awaken him she’s the one that has been called in so if she’s not herself the awakening’s not going to happen so it’s our duty
1:48:09
as hard as it is to be ourselves our full expression completely open completely in our power and i think a lot of times those are our two things we close but we also stay small because we know that when we’re in our full expression and in our full power uh we may be judged we may be treated like we’re too much we may be um you know rejected whatever it may be it may like you said shut him down i i might i mean i’m gonna it might sound abstract but the way i see this is like this and i totally agree i mean we’ve
1:48:50
talked about a lot of reasons why women have a guard these days and i mean if you continuously have sexual experiences where you’re not being honored or you’re not being respected of course you have a guard because why wouldn’t you that’s a natural protection mechanism not because you’re weak or because you you have a problem but because that’s what you experienced and um i believe and that’s the hardest thing but if we want to get even more esoteric i believe for every human what’s there at the end or what what our
1:49:31
main the reason why we’re here is to become totally realized totally enlightened awake and whatever that is that’s at least my belief in my experience and the most at least from what how my inner teacher tells me about it and what i see the most awakened state of a woman is when she is entirely open but it’s a different kind of openness than how most people see it it’s an openness that’s also an energetic shield of protection at the same time so this might and i’m with a grain of salt obviously because
1:50:16
i’m not saying just open you know just open and you’re gonna be protected obviously a lot of women listen to this might say but i opened and he he messed it up right [Music] but if you go deeper and deeper and know exactly where to open and where not to open um and by the way not opening to a man doesn’t mean you’re closed down necessarily so it’s also not so totally black and white but it’s also not that you’re richer than protecting yourself it’s that you’re still open but you don’t feel
1:50:51
safe yes and it’s i know this is esoteric but i wouldn’t share this if i hadn’t have an experience about experience but there is a saying in a shamanic book about a woman that’s a modern shaman or something i forgot it or the city shaman or something like that and he talks about a woman who goes in really dangerous districts like the bronx or whatever or the bonuses in in france and she goes almost with nothing on like really um yeah hot pants or something like that but never something happens to her now
1:51:36
am i saying you should do this [ __ ] no [ __ ] no but just talking energetic wise and about the metaphor when she was asked why is never something happening to you like people get shot all the time there something happens there um the thing what she basically answered was something along the lines of yes but i just trust the universe i have this deep trust and i and also listening so again the oracle protects you your intuition protects you and now i would go even as far and this is very provocative as well but a woman doesn’t need to have the
1:52:22
muscular strength of a man because her oracle energy protects much more than physical strength and i know this is very abstract but there is even a guy a forgotten name who practiced something along the lines of he could energetically protect himself in really dangerous environments where someone one almost wanted to kill him but the person couldn’t approach him in the end because energetically he was holding that space so strongly that there was no breach there was no gap there was nothing and so the goal is to
1:53:06
yes protect yourself but not in the sense of shutting down your heart and and isolating yourself but protect yourself energetically and then you can still remain open and that is the ultimate state of the feminine because then you’re open all the time and your oracle your intelligence protects has an energetic shield around you now this is of course not simple yeah i think it’s it’s tough because it’s hard to make that tangible especially with words absolutely um but experientially i i’d say that i i the
1:53:47
way i see what you’re saying is through the experience of especially like the metoo movement um you know women coming out from all over saying that they have these different stories of how that they were a victim to something and i kind of looked at my own life and i said i don’t really have a metoo story and that made me think about my personality of course i have this more overt masculine energy i usually in a group of girls i’m the mother hen you know i have this kind of protective nature about me i’m the oldest sister
1:54:21
you know what i mean like i have all these different things in my domestications and my conditioning and upbringing that have created this protective energy that it’s like just natural to me in a way and i don’t it’s not that i don’t feel afraid when i walk down the street it’s that i already have a subconscious like vigilance that’s going on and i project something that isn’t allowing that into my space like men will converse with me i’m not so close that it’s repulsive to men but
1:54:53
it’s that i’m not an easy target you know what i’m saying even though i have no art muscles you know like i don’t have a outward appearance that would say wow she’s going to beat me up or anything like that i just don’t put out that energy unless i want to attract the person for that reason you know what i mean if i want to be vulnerable with my husband or someone i feel safe with okay then i have to work i have to work harder maybe i’m letting down those walls to be able to be vulnerable because i have created
1:55:20
such a strong energy or shield in the protected physically protective nature um in my day-to-day life so i that’s how i can envision what you’re saying uh or put context to it i don’t know if that helps anyone listening but to me it’s like it is it’s an energy you have to exude which comes with you know to intellectualize it because sometimes we have to get there first it comes with the story of what do i actually intend to happen here what you know am i a victim in this situation where i walk down the street or am i a
1:55:56
woman who’s walking down the street and able to hold her own because she knows that she is not um someone who has so little worth that she should be attacking like i don’t know what the storyline is of a victim in that situation but i know a lot of the time when women are in victim mindset they don’t feel worth in their physical body they do feel small in their physical body i don’t ever feel small in my physical body i feel small in other ways maybe usually i feel big actually usually i feel too muchness so i wonder if that’s
1:56:32
a script you know different some people feel too little sometimes sometimes they feel too much i wonder my script might be just on the other side of the spectrum and that’s why i don’t have that experience i mean i know like if there’s a dude with a gun walking at me i’m gonna you know what i mean like this isn’t a good situation i’m gonna assess it and hopefully react and respond in a way that i can get through that but that’s not a common thing happening or generally men trying yeah yeah generally men trying to take
1:57:02
advantage right is not a common thing happening i think it’s i don’t take it i don’t like pat myself on the back for it it’s just i think that i have been domesticated a certain way you know my life has led me here to hold this certain energy space i do it for the women around me too i believe it’s a very touchy subject also it’s a very touchy subject about the me too because i mean if we take a basic law of attraction teaching and apply to the metoo movement it sounds like the most ludicrous and
1:57:37
dangerous thing only a psychopath in my opinion would say yeah but you know it’s your energy that attracted that you know you were naive it’s your energy you know and then i’m like okay wait a second you know what i mean it’s like i did i mean it’s it’s a touchy subject in that sense because yeah just because i already explained it and that’s i believe i believe it’s also a more complex subject it’s not as simple as as just this especially when we go into something like rape culture or something
1:58:11
like that which is of course has so much emotion yeah yeah and i know since we’re in here just to to hopefully you know add to this topic so that it is clear the idea of um well the idea of rape culture for instance and talking about this me too obviously that’s the major thing here is that where where women feel like they are being uh targeted and taken advantage of um by a man who’s consciously doing that we have talked a lot on this episode so far about the animal and this primal piece and and getting men to to
1:58:56
understand it and invest some in it what creates so i believe in two parts of us the animal and the artist and when we can understand that the artist is essentially the alchemist who takes this animal body that they’re born into with all of its hormones with all of its tendencies you know all of its innate tendencies and is able to alchemize it into something for service of his community and for the good of the community he has become the artist this is what the the artist is doing this is their work here
1:59:36
if we stay in the primal and animals aspect of it that’s only part of us this this is where some of that that that rape culture idea comes from and a lot of how they people try to explain how that’s a natural thing i mean i understand raping and pillaging and these things come with a lot of you know our uh generational lineage and trauma and all this stuff is coming through the animal dna of who we are however we are also a conscious ethereal spiritual being layered together so these two things are living in communion
2:00:13
and this is what this is what all this work we’ve been talking about today is all about is is allowing the energies the the two you know binary as we were talking about earlier the binary parts of us the two sides of us the animal the artist to live in communion because that is the only way that it’s allowed to live in truth and that is really the definition of truth is integrity right integrating these two things and i think that the difficulty and why it’s so touchy is because i mean i personally am sure you
2:00:49
can both relate i cannot understand why someone murders someone or rape so i i cannot understand it i can’t put myself into these shoes i have to really hold myself together to deal with the disgusting feeling i feel in my body when i come across something i always have a strong bodily response to something like that um and i think that’s why it’s so touching that’s why it’s so difficult i love what you said here but it’s so difficult to grasp what’s happening there because we can’t feel into it we
2:01:21
can’t understand it at the deepest level what’s really going on there and that’s also where i mean we we’re already in this topic but that’s also where all of these spiritual teachings become blurry everything becomes blurry because cool that you open cool that we should all open mask and feminine but that person got raped right and that’s just [ __ ] horrible you can’t say to that person open you know it’s like but again the world is more complex it’s not black and white and i find it
2:01:55
beautiful that we talk about this because it’s helping it’s helping to bring light to this and to bring awareness to this and i think it’s very important to be aware of this it is messy too and that’s the thing we have to do it even though it might not be perfect because it needs to be discussed um and god it sounds like so much of what we’ve discussed today all comes down to embodiment all comes down to is the the rapist embodied is the woman who gets raped in this scenario um not necessarily embodied there but
2:02:30
she becomes disembodied because of this trauma that happens this transgression is the conversation right like why are these things happening because we are not in our truth yeah period at the end of the day i know this is very so esoteric and okay that sounds yeah okay mercedes like just being your truth but i don’t know listen to this episode and see where it takes you and i’m sure it’ll lead you to your truth eventually if you stick with it so thank you for bearing through that with us because that is it is a tough
2:03:02
topic you know when we bring up these and i believe also i can feel it right now i don’t know about you guys but i can feel my energy the moment i talk about this topic it’s like an alertness like whoa wait a second almost a kind of don’t talk about it don’t mention it don’t go there don’t don’t do don’t talk anything about this but i think that’s just that’s especially why we have to do it that’s a beautiful point to your practice too yeah leadership so important but the the the edge you
2:03:35
know like this is an edge for for society generally and to speak to masculine feminine work when you talk about masculine work you talk so much about being on your edge you know david data’s work speaks about the the masculine edge like finding your edge over and over and that is your journey as a man to become as embodied in the awakened masculine as possible is finding that edge over and over and so a topic like this for instance can trigger that like oof and that feeling is well how how much can you if you ask yourself in that moment
2:04:08
how much can you touch that edge and kind of sit there for a minute in the uncomfortableness of it and be there because that’s the end if you don’t go there you don’t embody it and you don’t push your edge further no i love it yeah beautiful to wrap it up yeah like that i love it too i just you know there there’s just uh so much that lives in that space and i i think um hey this is the work we’re here to do we’re doing it so now this is this is an interesting turn here something jane and i think are both
2:04:44
both very passionate about and i talked about hormones just a moment ago but just because we’re these primal beings we have these functions that happen in our bodies um for women it’s very uh you know obvious we have a menstrual cycle every month and jade and i are super into tracking our hormonal cycles uh actually right now we just released an episode of with alyssa vidi who’s all about tracking your cycles and living in a more empowered state by knowing how your body works as a female when it would be the
2:05:16
best time to even you know go on an interview in which phase of your cycle that would be or for men in relationship with women how to understand a woman’s moon cycle so that he can work in relationship with her in a much more empowered way and this is what i want to touch on with you because i know you have some perspectives on periods and how men can use that um for the good of the relationship so let’s talk about your insights here i mean i’m just giving an example recently my my woman was just journaling her her
2:05:52
moon cycles and i told her hey baby you’re so cute when you do that like i can see her just you know journaling it down and i’m so touched like i could i could cried in that moment like she was so soft and innocent just diving into her own nature and i was like whoa baby it’s so beautiful so that’s the first thing i’m going to say and you can feel that i’m emotional about this in a beautiful way and um yes a woman’s period i mean obviously you had someone amazing on the podcasts i’m not going to share more about this
2:06:28
because i’m not an expert obviously on it i don’t know exactly how everything works but i know this i know that when a woman is in her period she has access or often embodies and he may or an immense softness and immense kind of nurturing and this loving beautiful loving innocence vulnerability of the feminine and we have not much understanding about this in our society as far as i know in ancient tribes when women were going through their periods they would gather together and just celebrate and do nothing or do
2:07:13
nothing not nothing celebrate but go retreat into the womb this kind of metaphor and i mean if you look at the walls i i don’t know of a company that says okay when you’re in your period you don’t have to come to work right it’s like you come to work that’s it yeah [ __ ] and hopefully not the word [ __ ] editor but it’s like there is no proper understanding there and um if there is no proper understanding in society already like if no one really gets it understands it it’s no one gives
2:07:46
a crap um then at least there has to be some understanding from the masculine because we also by the way go through something like the periods i don’t know the specifics there are people who know much more about this work but we also go through our but of course it’s different than what a woman goes through and different also in the sense of intensity and i talked about this in a post recently is um because a lot of women reached out to me a woman told me that her boyfriend’s always withdraws their love when she’s
2:08:25
going for her periods and and he’s just he’s such an amazing person but when she goes for period it’s like he changes completely he’s like a different person and obviously that’s hurting so much because here is this amazing person who holds space for you and you love him but then he can’t accept and see you in your in in this kind of stage and and my idea of it at least what my inner teacher tells me is that and i used to be like that because we don’t understand it and because we’re so
2:09:01
trapped in our ego and story we dismiss it ah yeah then and these stupid sayings which i heard as a as a teenager from my masculine role models yeah you know when she’s in her period she’s crazy you know when she’s in her period she talks rubbish just just mind your own business and i also saw i have also seen conscious men or seemingly conscious men who ramble something like that as well where i ask myself at an early age what the [ __ ] you can’t because i even in my mind one time i was like you’re not my role model in my mind i
2:09:40
was like you [ __ ] [ __ ] you’re not my role model no joke this is what happened but i didn’t express it obviously because it’s the older person the cousin or something like that but it’s enormous strength if you can stretch out of your story your own thing and be like okay i don’t experience a period like her but i’m going to give my best to understand hold space and support her and that’s all that’s required an empathetic approach you don’t have to read 20 books about it and tell her
2:10:23
exactly how it works you don’t have to be a pleaser and do some weird stuff and be like hey baby that’s called blah blah blah no but come from true integrity and also ask yourself why are you annoyed when she’s going through a period what inside you annoys you what do you not like about yourself because you’re not getting annoyed by her period that’s ridiculous it always resembles something within ourselves maybe you get annoyed by the vulnerability you feel maybe you get annoyed by showing an empathetic approach because
2:11:05
that means going out of your ego going out of your story going out of your me me meets all about me and wait it’s about her not about me my desires in that moment my story my mission my thing my success no it’s about her holding space and a lot of men have difficulties with this because most men and this is an honest truth label things as this brings me further on my path or not this brings me money or not [ __ ] it otherwise but you can’t you can’t compare things like that you can’t say something like this is idiotic
2:11:41
but oh yeah but that’s not making my business better if i have an empathetic approach when she goes for her periods oh yeah you know it’s you cannot compare such things to one another and the reason why is because you can’t compare having an empathetic and compassionate approach to anything else because it’s literally one of the most powerful liberating and loving and healing things you can do you don’t compare that [ __ ] to anything yeah thank you i don’t really even have much to add to
2:12:17
to to layer onto that it’s just a it’s nice to hear a man about it yeah just be supportive because this is yeah you know what it’s not the funnest part of being a woman but it also but i don’t ever hear that i don’t ever hear a man say like oh it’s so cute that she’s tracking it so that’s very sweet yeah and i mean and there is work that men can dive into we’ve talked about a zillion times on the show if they want to do that um but i think really at the end of the day it’s about it’s like like what you said
2:12:50
why is this thing triggering me if it is triggering me and i mean the researchers on on menstrual cycles basically point to what’s you know saying the veil is thin especially the week before your period pms week um which means women are going to test you more if we want to put it in the context of this episode women are going to trigger you more because she doesn’t have the veil is thin she doesn’t have that layer of empathy she normally has because of where her hormones are at and so she is going to trigger you and you’re going to
2:13:27
be like why is she being such a [ __ ] is it that she’s being a [ __ ] or she’s saying some [ __ ] that’s kind of honest and just in a rougher way than you’re used to her saying it you know for the rest i loved it wow so i loved it yeah [ __ ] yeah i did since you said that men uh don’t have you know this of course men don’t have the same cycle that they go through they do have their own cycles but i was going to ask you just if you have anything to say on this topic around boner shame because
2:13:59
that happens for men especially when puberty starts um you i don’t know if the translation i’m not i’m not i know i know what a boner is obviously but in what sense in what sense shape did you shame did you have shame that you have a boner yeah so like when men are younger especially and they don’t know what to do with this you know and it happens sometimes in the middle of class at school or something like that they would be ashamed if it showed through their pants or something um so that was
2:14:27
a question i had for you do you have any i don’t know anything to add to that because i know this is something that then becomes this issue with pornography where we have to like get it done quick and put it away and like don’t get caught and you know what i mean a shame building around penises yeah i mean this is actually you giving me an idea because this is actually something people not talking about much and it’s not really touched but there are certain things a man goes through in his teenage years and one
2:15:00
thing i’m gonna add here is almost every teenager if he still even if he’s heterosexual has some kind of experience where he asks himself do i get sexually turned on by other men or not and you won’t believe it i don’t know if you guys have heard that but the amount of men who still suffer from this in late adult life not because they are not heterosexual maybe because they really have feelings for other men or bisexual whatever but so many times it’s because that wound just like boner shame
2:15:42
hasn’t been treated there is even a name for that it’s referred to as a mental illness where you constantly question your own sexuality all the time like and also put yourself for the most horrific things where it sometimes ends up that you watch porn and and like literally it’s it gets in this vicious cycle but i would say it’s something similar to boner shaming it’s like and also to erectile dysfunction um all of that is most likely something along childhood or in puberty which appeared in your consciousness
2:16:24
and your mind went went in hard saying something like you’re bad you’re dirty you shouldn’t feel that that’s awful and being a toddler not a [ __ ] toddler what am i saying here but being in a teenager or whatever high school whatever not a toddler being in [ __ ] high school that’s getting weird but but but being in high school it’s like you you don’t necessarily share this with someone right you don’t go to your teacher or to your best friend and say hey you know i’m in my mind thinking
2:16:56
whether i like boys or not it’s you don’t do that right because there’s so much shaming around that so you suppress it inwards and it’s nothing it’s just an experience it’s just an experience in your consciousness but there is no understanding of it there is no one holding the space and here again it comes to do you have a father that is deeply conscious because if he is he will hold the space and if you come to him and say dad i have these weird thoughts he will say son no worry let’s talk
2:17:30
about it and even if you are even if you like men i love you as you are i don’t give a crap but i know you i feel you and really support there so what men would need is then that’s where you really need other men because that will be very difficult for a woman to help you with because she cannot put yourself in these shoes to some degree for sure but dare you really the man with a man who has a similar experience and who just tells you hey [ __ ] it stop thinking about that it’s in our past yeah it’s normal relax
2:18:07
yeah normalizing that is a serious serious thing normalizing that oh yeah um we’re wrapping down the show here so i just i’m picking your brain because your your mind is fascinating to me especially on on things around males and because jaden and i have such a strong male following on our personal platform so i think over 90 mail on both of our personal platforms so things that really i think men hold shame around are things for me because i’m i’ve been shame-bound most of my life especially around sexuality so for
2:18:41
me it’s just feels you know part of my calling is to bring awareness to these things and normalize them um i want to know your thoughts or if and this is this can be completely you can be this is out of my realm i have no idea but on circumcision um yeah and if you what you what your beliefs are around circumcision because i’ve recently just talked to a couple different people on this and it’s you know the spectrum on how people feel about this is just so all over the place so i want to keep opening this conversation
2:19:13
because it’s so uncomfortable especially for a lot of men in in our culture here in the us for sure um yeah i’m going to leave it like that how do you want to enter this this might trigger people but i’m going to speak my truth um doing something like that with a young boy who hasn’t explored his sexuality who hasn’t made up his mind and said i wanna do this because i know what it actually means is is [ __ ] and i i don’t know too much about it in terms of how it creates trauma and all of that
2:20:02
but i’m completely sure and it feels true in my body that i mean i am half turkish half austrian but i’ve i’ve been i i was born in in vienna austria and i know from traditional turkish culture it was just something that was done and not maybe necessarily in the most nicest way in a very weird and traumatizing way and i mean you can’t do this to someone who hasn’t explored their sexuality and this can lead to a tremendous trauma because someone is doing something there where you don’t want anything to do
2:20:44
anything and unless it’s like an experience in the very beginning of your life yeah exactly and there are many people i mean cam fraser i don’t know if you’re familiar with cam fraser but he is australia’s leading leading men’s sexuality coach he’s also an instagram ever has a podcast i was recently on his podcast and he’s really about man’s pleasure and all of that his name is cam fraser really really beautiful guy if you’re listening cam i [ __ ] love you you’re amazing
2:21:16
um but probably he won’t listen and i’m not sure maybe but um he has so much on his to do anyway but he talks about that when you do how is it called when you do circumcision circumcision you’re taking away parts of the nerves and don’t take me literally he knows much more i believe it was him he knows much more i have no idea what exactly happens or maybe it was even someone else who posted that maybe i’m even wrong so i don’t want anyone to take me literally here you’re cutting off the most sensitive part of
2:21:49
the man’s body yes yes and i’ve seen more people share about this and then i ask myself holy [ __ ] how can you do something like and also think about the universe and and just about on a spiritual approach everything works in harmony right and yes there are random when we have statistics of course there’s always something random always involved in some way but if you are born and you have a cop that’s working why change something why cut something who comes only a human trapped in their mind can come up with an idea
2:22:33
like this it’s just like growing up and saying hey let’s let’s cut i’m gonna cut my arm away because that’s what my religion says or whatever like what yeah this is how i came the universe is much wiser than me and we don’t know that much about the body we don’t know that much about the brain it’s fascinating how the body works people are like oh we’re so spiritual our minds well but think about your [ __ ] body the process it goes through and my sister got pregnant recently egg
2:23:06
has given birth recently and she told me about all these things how it works exactly unbelievable why the [ __ ] are you cutting skin away when the intelligence the universe is doing something like that yeah thank you for that yeah it’s such a it’s a tough it’s a tough one and i think it’s tough because we’ve sold ourselves on a story for so long and then you want to believe the story we want to have the story and when you see your dad and your family you know other people in your life that are that you’re they look a
2:23:40
different way than you you know what i mean so it goes or they you want to look like them you want to have the same foreskin cut away or not whatever you know whatever is happening for you and your society your culture and your household um to me it came this idea while you’re talking about it it being this part of a man’s body you know we can we can uh correlate it to the clitoris the clitoris is an undeveloped penis this is how before we’re you know decided we both have essentially clitoris and that same nervous um
2:24:17
nervous system heavily nerve what do i say nerve heavy area so i’m trying to say like the clitoris becomes this part of the penis the foreskin area of the penis and the head of the penis and if we cut away a clitoris we call that genital mutilation so if we cut away the same essentially the same nerves there in the penis this is this is genital mutilation but we have to start talking about this to change the story as well um i i thought about you know for people to kind of step outside of the storyline that might come from their
2:24:53
religion or might come from this thing about well it’s unhealthy to have an uncircumcised penis but uh well we’ve had it that way for how many millennia you know what i mean like how how many centuries have we lived this way and if we know how to clean it and everything we’re not yeah we didn’t have the sanitation back then right well yeah definitely we have to teach our children how to do that too i mean you know we this is just part of what that is but i was thinking visually to to to step
2:25:19
aside if you’re a man listening to this or woman listening this and it’s really hard for you to get conceptually there because the story is so deep um in your head about circumcision is necessary think about cutting off something as simple as the tip of your finger because the tip of your finger doesn’t have anywhere near as many nerve endings as that part of a man’s body like the penis does but the tip of your finger think about how much sensation the tip of your forefinger has had and experienced throughout your
2:25:49
lifetime whatever it’s touched i don’t know all the joys that it’s experienced that have come just through the tip of your finger just the nerves in the tip of your finger so when we think about cutting off something with that many nerve endings on a human body that’s what you’re you’re sacrificing the tip of your finger times zillion whatever joy this is giving you times however many more nerve endings i’m not a scientist but i’m just trying to visually give this to people so anyway thank you for your thoughts on
2:26:18
that because i i know we’ve brought it up on the show a few times because i think it is something we have to keep bringing back around and touching on even though it is really sensitive i think a lot of mothers when they are having a son a lot of mothers are conflicted about it but it’s in my experience not only i have a son that’ll be six this year but also with other women that i know that have had sons they were really on the fence about it or they didn’t want to do it and it was the dad that was like well i don’t want him to
2:26:49
be different than me and his brother or i don’t want him to get made fun of and so it was the dad that talked them into it actually which is is a hard thing to to wrap your head around but um i know that for me i’ve said multiple times that it’s like my biggest regret in parenting is listening to that um that voice from his his father and going through with the circumcision then they messed it up and they thought they’re gonna have to do it again and like that was the intro to his life and not only that you read you know in peter
2:27:22
levine’s books about how when we are strapped down and performed a procedure that there’s there is ptsd from those experiences and that’s how some men are starting their life you know so um i do have a lot of i wasn’t aware at the time um but once i was made aware now i do feel very passionate about trying to help other women become aware and men because it seems that um even men in my life now that you know are starting to walk towards consciousness they still don’t think there’s anything
2:27:56
wrong with circumcision at all so there is a lot of awareness that needs to come yeah there’s a shame trigger around well i’m already circumcised so i don’t want to say something’s wrong here because nothing is wrong with the circumcised penis it’s the act of circumcising that we’re pointing out here we need to not do this um so that’s an important i’m so glad you bring that up to jade because the shame piece around men that already have been circumcised by the way wasn’t their
2:28:22
choice anyway but they in their heads think that the uncircumcised penis is less attractive too you know there’s a little scripture around that too yeah women too women feed into it i love that you’re bringing this subject in because it’s important to talk about it and i also i really wanna i i really wanna um praise you both because you are not afraid to go into the deep topics and this is just something i see a lot especially on social media is that you have these people who only do the kind of viral
2:28:57
shits and really don’t touch these topics out of the fear of okay i might lose people or and that’s [ __ ] leadership is exactly what you both are doing that’s what i’m saying thank you receive that i sweat a lot i always sweat like right here in this area when i talk about taboo topics or when i’m in a therapy session yeah like i noticed that wow that’s how i know it’s like okay i gotta stay with you what a response what a response of the body yeah yeah um but it’s also now i kind of
2:29:25
know oh that’s what’s happening and my breathing you know changes too where i’m like okay breathe because i get tense because it’s nerve-wracking but um these are important things and and speaking to breath i want to bring that up with you especially because this is something you do a lot of um with your breath work is crucial yeah so yeah i would just want to and and i know we’re running out of time but we just want to hear quickly like why why is breath work crucial to you right why should we prioritize this
2:29:57
right now i need to take a deep breath and i could i was like i need to ask him the thing is the thing is i when i first came across pranayama or yogic breathwork is yoga like almost everything stems out of yoga there is warrior yoga intimacy yoga and breathwork is kind of the pranayama version of yoga most often it’s referred to but i’m not an expert in this anyway but the thing is um [Music] i know not one single tool that changes my awareness my physical my mentally my emotional my spiritual state faster
2:30:41
and more powerfully than breath work and i’m not going to say sitting in still stillness meditation is bad but it’s just very hard in this society because whenever i just sat down okay close my eyes i was just thinking it’s thinking meditation you sit down to think and i know with for sure that the great yogis and buddhists are not thinking well of course maybe a thought appears meditation’s not a topic i’m not saying you don’t have any thoughts but they’re not sitting down thinking and they’re in
2:31:14
their meditation thinking it’s a totally different approach it’s a different la also how you grow up if you if you live in an ashram or something like that and you have nature around you and you don’t wake up with an alarm clock and you have this really at one with nature it’s totally different you’re much more easily can access stillness but in this world if you live in a big city like new york like london like paris whatever it’s like so much stimulation social media all of that and i’m just
2:31:50
for stillness meditation is not enough i i’m just like maybe relaxed but i don’t want to be relaxed i want to be [ __ ] grounded i want to have a tool that gets me out of my fight flight responses my anxiety my anger my fear and breath work is it and most people practice very easy pranayama breath work so you have nadi short enough maybe nadi children is not an easy breath work practice but you have this kind of box breathing four seconds in four second hold these are all beginner practices to calm your mind
2:32:26
to begin and to relax but if you get into advanced yogic breath work if you really start to get into asanas and practice for instance capolavati or pastrica or breath of fire whatever name we use or really intense kundalini yoga advance kundalini yoga it’s unbelievable because you’re not relaxing well maybe you are you are not just chilling down you are initiating yourself into higher states of awareness and consciousness and my spiritual practice is is my foundation it’s my fundament now i practice one and a half hours
2:33:11
every morning of intense breath work there are days where i don’t do it there is a week where i don’t do it as much but i practice every single day but optimally it’s one and a half hour that’s very intense advanced breath work and that changes everything it makes you stronger and if you think about it in a yogic approach that prana that you create that life force energy prana helps you i don’t get really sick anymore like catching a cold i’m not afraid of it like i i don’t have a single fear in my body
2:33:45
oh [ __ ] what if i catch a cold oh it’s cold or anything it’s like the prana is just so [ __ ] strong and even if something comes into my system almost all of the time my body beats it easily and i just don’t know how to detox it yeah exactly if you think also about cells need to [ __ ] again i’m not a scientist or anything but cells need to [ __ ] yeah and especially in your lower stomach that area is not getting enough oxygen because we have such a weak and shallow breath in the society trauma breathing
2:34:20
it’s just what comes up for me right now which is kind of intense but yeah but getting the breath deeper getting the breath into the perineum area um that’s that’s where you really shifts your state that’s where you really connect to your body that’s where you can really shift out of intense suffering and trauma and i had my most intense traumatic emotional releases for breath work so it’s what i teach my clients also um when they’re ready for it and um yeah but only with my clients and if
2:34:53
it’s really in a setting of where i know it’s totally safe because and and this is also the reason why i don’t teach breathwork necessarily in classes or anything like that is because i don’t have a transmission from a yogi and in a tradition of real yogis and real enlightened beings you gotta give energetical transmissions and or at least have studied a long time with a master and i have people around me i have practiced with people who taught me so much but that’s why i keep it more for myself and
2:35:27
only bring some components in with clients when it’s really necessary and when they want this but yeah so breathwork is just the most powerful tool i know of to for everything just your spiritual level revolution but spiritual practice is the key if you want to really become an embodied man because spiritual practice is embodiment work periods yeah what a beautiful invitation for people to dive deeper into their spiritual practice and breath work whatever that whatever you land on try that like it’ll come to you you know
2:36:06
what i mean one last thing i want to add here sorry to interrupt you but um people say there um one of my recent mentors told me something along the lines of don’t complain if you didn’t practice i don’t you complaining did you practice yes okay let’s talk about it like hey yeah my life all of that did you practice right yes i did practice one and a half hours all right let’s talk about it what’s what’s going on or did you practice no i didn’t go practice but but you know this thing no shut the
2:36:41
[ __ ] up gopro yeah and and this is also the thing people are like yeah i’m not awakening i’m not attracting a conscious man or conscious woman yeah you only do five minutes of meditation each morning are you [ __ ] kidding me this path is hard these yogi’s they’re not chilling and just doing five minutes of meditation there some of them are doing 15 hours of yoga meditation breath work that’s [ __ ] for years and years putting us up in a cage isolating himself don’t complain about your life
2:37:15
if you are not practicing yeah and this is also for me this is also the approach i have for myself i’m like wait a second i practiced 20 minutes 30 minutes this morning am i are you [ __ ] kidding me that’s what i asked myself oh yeah my life you know no practice boom i love hearing it from a man because that is the largely the rigid ideology that needs to be shaken you know we need to shake people sometimes into this type of work like hey are you doing this practice and i i just add the little caveat on there too
2:37:50
that don’t be don’t allow it to overwhelm me like well i’m never gonna be able to do 15 hours of breath work a day or practice a day you know what i mean i don’t know 15 hours of breath work whatever happened but 15 hours of meditation a day don’t allow the overwhelm of it to not get you to begin the work if it is five minutes a day you can do do that and it will open up whatever the next allowance can be for you um so yeah i just want to add that caveat to it and just just begin like that’s where that’s
2:38:23
where it has to start is you taking the the initiative to and also what’s happening i love what you’re saying what’s happening is the mind resists it because the mind doesn’t want to [ __ ] focus on the breath for one and a half hours and go through all kinds of sequences and really hold that there are some breathing techniques which are just exhausting if you are not fully alert and really with a state of power and presence engaging in them it’s like oh my god this is so difficult because you
2:38:57
really it but what my recent mentor told me is in your practice your practice is the altar where you bring all of your [ __ ] all of your shadows all of your pain and yeah that’s what you do that’s that’s how it works that’s the shadow work that’s the real work it’s not just in the podcast here we’re talking about it but tomorrow or afterwards yeah we practice it or or maybe not hopefully yeah i i love the mantra though i’m going to keep that with me for sure that if you know don’t complain unless you’ve practiced
2:39:32
you know make sure that those two things are in alignment and uh and that’s really really beautiful stuff and and i know that you you mentioned when you’re talking about breath work that you don’t invite all of your clients to do it unless they are ready and just as a word of i don’t even want to call it warning because again i don’t want anyone to feel overwhelmed to a point where they don’t begin the work or give any reason that they can’t begin but there is some some uh warning needed in deep
2:40:01
work because spontaneous you know kundalini awakenings for instance or things that come through breath work need to be held like you’re saying in the space of someone who knows how to assist you with that energetic release however don’t let that stop you from trying what you can do on your own because i believe that doing a lot of this stuff you have to play with it see how it feels in your body and get experiential and by the way if you have something that comes up look there are therapists and coaches and
2:40:37
people and mentors and shamans and yogis that can help you all over the place all you have to do is reach out and ask for the assistant but i love what you said about the kundalini especially i mean their educate their uh educations i’m going to use the word education because no trainings there are kundalini trainings one weekend and you have a certificate as a teacher yeah i’m like what what that’s [ __ ] dangerous because if you know what kundalini energy is how powerful it is because when the snake comes it [ __ ] comes
2:41:15
and it’s respect like i’m saying this from the deepest respect don’t [ __ ] with the snake or this the snake is only the metaphor obviously right the kundalini yes but don’t [ __ ] with it have respect and it will be all right but there is a reason why people who have kundalini awakenings most often get initiated into them have a proper teacher who helps you because yeah he’s just yeah otherwise it can look like a mental breakdown or something you know that’s not you didn’t get walked through you didn’t get initiated
2:41:58
this is getting very esoteric again as we see here there’s all there’s books called the kundalini awakening if you want to read more on whatever that is and any of this breath work um and of course we will ask people to go to your um all of your platforms especially your social media but before we get there i want to just ask a few short questions that we like to ask everyone who comes on the show so first off if you could hug your younger self right now laureen what would you say trust the process it will be all rights and
2:42:39
if it isn’t all right yet then it’s not the end yet yeah if you could have the whole world read one book which would it be i mean that’s a given it’s my book understand women better available on amazon kindle and printed version and also as a digital ebook on my website laureenclean.com so i’m gonna say something selfish here but i truly believe it i love it um if you could whisper one phrase to everyone on the planet what would it be trust her oracle hmm that’s good before we let you go where
2:43:27
can people find you online my main platforms are main platform is instagram just handle graham my podcasts delorean crane podcast or just laureen crane my website laureenclean.com my youtube laureenclean so just lauren i’m going to spell it for everyone it’s l-o-r-i-n-k-r-e-n-n thank you yeah trust me guys you will women men everyone listening non-binary folks this man is doing healing work and you need him in your life so go follow his instagram jade and i are putting his posts back and forth between the two of us every day basically what
2:44:16
happens is i go in i see some posts i send them to jaden then i go into my dm house yeah jake’s already sent me this thing so they’re flying around all of our sphere everyone who who we already know personally definitely has seen your post come through is probably already following you but that really touches me thank you i mean you are doing this work you’re living this work i can tell just here by talking to you and of course listening to your show and seeing your posts so i just want to thank you
2:44:46
for doing this and sitting with us through these hard topics too because you know it’s not necessarily even your sphere but i just felt that it was you would have something here to add and just having the conversation about some of these things is worthwhile doesn’t matter what it looks like to be honest we just need to be keeping it in our atmosphere so it can get clear so i appreciate you so much thank you for doing the work you’re doing and thank you for being a light marine yes thank you so much as i said before it it
2:45:13
was truly an honor to be here thank you thank you all right so we will send you all of the uh information basically for the show when it’s going to launch promo videos yeah i’m gonna do you will you put it on your story and tag me yeah yes because then i’m just gonna repost all of this makes the process easier and then i’m gonna shout you guys out of course as well because i mean you have much bigger audiences than me than me but still of course you guys are really doing amazing work and thank you
2:45:45
i felt really you know it’s just i don’t want to this anyone or anything but it just can be sometimes tricky being on podcasts when the interviewer has just a certain frame of mind that they really want to put you in and they really want to know this and they’re not going with your flow and i really so appreciate you went with my flow and i because of you and the space you both create i was able to share deeply so that’s on you thank you received thank you thank you so much of course you’re so welcome yeah all
2:46:20
right so um yeah well jade will email you all that information but we’ll be in touch on social medias as usual and we’ll definitely tag you when we post so awesome thank you so much guys and i wish you a really really beautiful day thanks for staying up late with us yeah good night he was really um so refreshing to experience a man in the work you know and i know jade you and i this is so much of our calling here is supporting generally humans men and women but because we have a very large male following
2:47:03
supporting men to do this work has been i felt really called and i know you’ve expressed the same of just making a space where whether it comes through our voice or the voice of our hosts or our the people we host you know our guests is what i meant giving a space here for that work to um be her for that idea that ideal ideology of men doing the work to be heard is so cool like we are we are creating this place like like laureen just said you know like we are doing that and i do receive that because it is true like we we didn’t
2:47:42
think couple years ago when we put this thing together this show together that it would we’d get here i don’t know i mean it’s not like we didn’t think it would ever happen but just seeing it happen and come to fruition feels really empowering like cool like what do we do next like what is what’s more to come from this you know and it just feels like hell yeah we’re in it we’re doing it so thank you magic mobbers who are listening right now and especially you know for you fellas or for you women who are
2:48:11
awakening who are doing this work alongside us when we have these podcasts and then you take something from it and you read the book and you apply it to your life or you grab a journal or whatever thank you for doing that it is so crucial to raising the vibration on this planet and that’s why we’re so thankful to be sharing this world with y’all yeah right sorry that was my well-fed feel no i agree on all of it um yeah it is it is it gives me an overwhelming amount of joy um i know that our magic tricks are pretty
2:48:48
similar today i noticed like once again wow what uh you wanna you wanna go through yours yeah okay okay wait so then i’m i’m not gonna change my magic trick i’m just gonna add something on because it popped in my head as i was finishing that little rant um a maybe magic trick that i should have asked laureen to give but that he said on his show that it just popped in when we were talking here he said if deuce if you do not have said bros if you do not have a journal what the [ __ ] are you doing yeah he said you cannot experience
2:49:26
growth without a journal fellas women i know we might be more already we probably have journals i don’t know i didn’t grow up with one my mom told me never to write anything down so then i was like allergic but now i journal everything you know that’s definitely part of my process i talk about it all the time jade you talk about it too all the time this is a necessary part of growth is getting stuff physically out of your body onto the page so take it from laureen men grab a journal any piece of paper or use
2:49:53
your phone whatever write the [ __ ] down that comes out of you and it will change you it will bring you towards awakening truth and consciousness we love you for it okay but my magic trick is discerning whether something is new or a no okay so both feel very similar because you know when something’s a no your body closes down and tightens and fear surfaces this is you know very sometimes even icky feeling or just like you’re like no i don’t want to do it now when is that feeling actually something new and not a no right
2:50:37
this is where the discernment comes in if it’s a no you’re going to feel the contraction and stagnancy stagnancies that’s an important word there if it’s new you’ll feel the contraction of fear at the same time as excitement excitement is you know something [Music] for the future where you feel an opening there though right so like if you can look past the fear you’re experiencing now and you have excitement that you can see as projecting into the future that there may be an opening there
2:51:08
where there’s something you could look forward to that’s something new it’s scary at first so you might feel that trigger of like oh i gotta contract no like that’s a no because i feel the contraction look deeply and discern whether there is stagnancy there or whether there is the openness of excitement as the last flavor you you sense there and if it excites you and scares you at the same time to put it in other words if it excites you and scares you at the same time probably means that you should do it
2:51:43
that probably means that it’s just new to you okay so that’s my magic trick is it a no or is it new and those are the ways that you can discern it what is your magic for us so minus is some sort of similar it’s called muscle testing it’s basically like asking your body for an answer so this only works if you have a good relationship with your body but the other two things that can stop it from working are if you have a habit of lying because if you’re lying your body is absorbing that and it’s it doesn’t
2:52:23
feel good in your body so you therefore your body’s not able to speak its truth to you so there’s that and then also if you’re like very tech heavy like if you’ve always got your cell phone on you if you’re um you know your life is void of like grounding in the grass um if you like sit with your laptop on your lap a lot anything that like involves a lot of tech around you those are things that can block this from working um but a way you can find out if it works so um well i’ll tell you that but first
2:52:52
i’ll tell you what muscle testing is so muscle testing is if you make a duck bill with your hands so like if you make with one hand you form it into like a duck’s mouth as if you’re making a duck shadow right and then you put your other hand as a duck bill but put your like so say your right hand the two fingers are in between your left hands fingers right so it’s like two duck mouths together one duck’s mouth is inside the other duck’s mouth right does that make sense hopefully to me it makes sense yeah but
2:53:25
i can see you so hopefully people can think about if you were gonna use just two fingers to do a shadow puppet on the wall mm-hmm yeah okay so you’ve got your right hand um fingers inside your left hand fingers two ducks and you have to ask a yes or no question so this is how you find out what feels like a yes and what feels like a no so first you’re going to say a true statement and see how that feels and then you’re going to say a not true statement so for me i’m going to say i my name is jade bryce and i am 36
2:54:07
years old is that true and then i’m gonna push down on the outer fingers and see how that feels so my when i push down on my outer fingers my left hand my right fingers don’t provide much uh room like there’s not much happening right there’s no blacks there’s reflectivity so that’s what my yes feels like so then it’s always important that you say thank you to clear out that question and you can move on to the next one like thank your body for that answer then to find out what a no feels like i’m going
2:54:42
to say my name is jade bryce and i am 40 years old and i can see that when i say no like there’s a there’s more lacks like there’s more movement when i ask that so that’s muscle testing and i’ve met i have worked and met psychics that use this as their way of receiving answers um but the way that paul czech teaches it is just you asking your body what would serve it best like should i do cardio today you get a yes or no should i do weights today you get a yes or no would it serve me best to have chicken today yes or no or
2:55:22
to have more veggies today yes or no like you can ask all types of questions for what your body needs and your body will answer you through this muscle testing so that’s how you find out what your yes or no feels like it’s either a lot of give or no give and then you can ask that question all the time you just have to make sure to like thank your body in between the questions that way you’re moved on to the next question um and if it’s not working for you if a yes and no feels the same then you go to why
2:55:56
what’s what’s causing the interference in your relationship with your body so that your body can speak to you because this is a proven tool that can be used so you can you know do more grounding you can um ask yourself where maybe you’re not speaking your truth or maybe where you’re lying to yourself um or you can maybe do a little you don’t have to detox and not use tech just keep it off your body because that does mess with our energetic charge so yeah that’s uh that’s something that to me when i found
2:56:30
that tool i thought it was mind-blowing i was like i mean it sounds so silly i mean my kids like it too like my kids do it so um yeah i thought it was a cool little a cool little magic trick it actually sounds like a magic trick so yeah it does sound like magic i like it i mean intuition is magic i suppose at the end of the day because we can’t really see it and we have to just trust it oh that’s yeah everyone in this which i know it is it’s a form of intuition yeah and we have to trust we have to
2:57:02
in this situation we have to trust ourselves which is the hardest thing ever because people right now i i can feel in myself in my skepticis skeptical mind um that resistance of i don’t trust this is this science science proven you know what i mean yeah but that’s me not wanting to trust myself because i know the answer to all the questions i’m going to ask myself especially about my body what i should do today with it but i have to be able to trust that whenever i answer that i can trust the answer
2:57:33
yeah and there is a book i don’t have the name of it i was looking in my notes i’m not seeing it but there is a book on this i believe it’s just called muscle testing there’s a whole book on it so um for people who are yeah all right magic moppers thank you so much for tuning in and taking this journey with us if this episode held some magic for you please share it with your friends and family this would mean so much to us and don’t forget to join us on our instagram page at the magic hour and let us know what your favorite
2:58:02
episodes have been so far we appreciate all of your feedback and really want to know what is lighting you up we do we do and with that please great review subscribe you guys you guys you guys we love you so much we love doing this work as you know every time we talk to you this is our baby this is the thing that we don’t make any money from this we just are doing it because it fills us up it has changed our lives and that might be the selfish part of it but we also feel like by doing it it allows and invites other people to do the work
2:58:34
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2:59:12
it lights us up and i want to remind you also that we release a new episode every monday so you can catch us again next week or head over into our podcast library now and listen in on whatever calls to you we’ll meet you there until then fam until next monday be alive